The Buddy Comics empire expands with two new titles and a new installment of The Adventures of Baby Bud.
We meet Mister Meowster, the most legendary feline investigator of his neighborhood, who’s called upon to use his Sherlockian skills in search of missing mice. In 11-Dimensional Hyperspace, SpaceCat tunnels to the next iteration of reality in her starship. Finally, Baby Buddy contends with a dark chapter from the past, when there was a shortage of the very stuff of life.
All covers created via natural language AI and pixlr.
Mister Meowster is the greatest detective for at least three blocks.
SpaceCat tunnels through 11-dimensional hyperspace to reach the next stack in the braneworld! M-theory enthusiasts and cat lovers won’t be able to put this down!
Before the Great Turkey Shortage of 2021, there was the Great Turkey Shortage of 2015. In Chapter 6, we visit that grim chapter in in Buddy’s life, when he was forced to eat chicken.
TMT: Too Much Turkey chronicles Chubby Buddy as he eats his way out of Turkopolis, the City of Delicious Turkey.
Buddy the Tiger: Meowscular Hunter follows a fully grown Buddy as he takes his rightful place as king of the jungle and doesn’t have to wait for stupid humans to feed him.
Meowstar 2177 centers on the exploits of Space Admiral Pâtéstalker and the fabled starship UCN Nap Enforcer.
Join Bud on his very first dangerous mission in Turkopolis, back when he was just a tiny kitten.
I created all the artwork in this post using a natural language processing AI and pixlr.
Cats from all walks of life react to news that humans want to join the species.
There have been several controversial stories lately about humans who identify as cats, or want to become cats. Most of them are hoaxes, but you can’t put things past crazy humans. We asked actual cats what they think about the idea.
What do you think?
“Does this mean they’re not going to be our servants anymore?” – Princess Sprinkles, 6, house cat
“I identify as a hulking tiger.” – Tiger, 11, indoor-outdoor menace
“They can identify as Jovian moons for all I care, as long as dinner is still served on time.” – Crispy Cream, 4, house cat
“I say, dear fellow, I should rather think they lack the fur.” – Niles, 10, British cat
“What am I thinking about? I’m thinking about chocolate rivers, candy-coated gumdrops, and Lifesavers made of cheese!” – Chonkmatic the Magnificent, King of North American cats
“WATCH ME GO!!! WATCH ME! I’M GONNA RUN FAST NOW!!! YEEEEAAAHHH!” – Mari, 4 months, house kitten
The AI-powered device ensures felines never have to see the bottom of their bowls again.
NEW YORK — Life is full of unpleasantness, like being able to see the bottom of your bowl. But what if someone told you he could fix that?
Enter Buddy the Cat’s SmartHuman Feeding System™, a device that harnesses the power of AI and cutting-edge hardware to make sure you never see the bottom of your bowl again.
SmartHuman was designed with weight sensors and an AI-enabled camera system to determine when the food in your bowl is getting low. If the on-board algorithms detect low levels of kibble, SmartHuman sends a text to your servant every 15 seconds until the device registers fresh kibble in the bowl.
And if the unthinkable should happen and you really are subjected to the horrific sight of the bottom of your bowl, SmartHuman’s built-in klaxon and emergency lights guarantee your human servants won’t have a second’s peace until they do what they’re supposed to and promptly refill your bowl. The system even requires the human to issue an apology before the sound and lights subside.
“I haven’t had to meow in annoyance or raise a paw once since I got the SmartHuman system,” raved Def the Defenestrator, a popular catfluencer with more than 240,000 followers on Meower. “The threat of getting bombarded with 110-decibel alerts to refill my bowl is enough to make my human servant get off her lazy behind and make sure my bowl is refilled before there’s a problem.”
The SmartHuman’s inventor has a background in feline teleportation and string cheese theory, but was prompted to design his device when he saw the bottom of his dry food bowl twice in as many months.
“I was literally starving,” Buddy said, adding that his “lazy human servant made me wait four minutes and 13 seconds before he refilled my bowl” during the second incident.
Vowing never to go hungry again, the entrepawneur built the first SmartHuman prototype in his garage, using a Raspberry Pi and a digital scale he ordered off Amazon.
He brought his idea to Shark Tank in late 2021 and successfully pitched Mr. Wonderful, who bought a 15 percent stake in SmartHuman™ in exchange for a $150,000 investment. The product entered production earlier this summer and is now available in stores and online.
“Cats love the SmartHuman™, but humans? Not so much,” Buddy the Cat admitted.
Mr. Wonderful (Kevin O’Leary) outbid fellow Sharks Mark Cuban, Barbara Corcoran and Laurie Greiner to partner with Buddy the Cat and invest in SmartHuman™.
Not one to rest on his laurels, the inventive feline said he’s working on a software update that will make the device compatible with wet food as well. In early beta testing, SmartHuman successfully prompted humans to feed wet food to their feline masters on time. Wet Mode includes a new feature as well: If the wet food remains untouched after a three-minute timer elapses, SmartHuman sends another text to the human, informing them the food isn’t satisfactory and should be replaced with another meal.
“Humans are stupid, and they don’t understand when we meow to them in complaint because we don’t feel like eating tuna or whatever on a given night when we’d prefer turkey,” Buddy said. “When this update goes live, cats will be able to enjoy meals of their choosing, every time.”
Meowfioso cats planned the biggest score of their lives, demanding UPS’ entire inventory of boxes.
ATLANTA — A gang of cats led by notorious crime boss “Lucky” Louis Pawtenza surrounded UPS headquarters on Monday, blocking all exits and demanding the company relinquish its inventory of boxes.
With hundreds of his soldiers, capos and mercenaries pointing weaponry at the delivery company’s office building, Pawtenza shouted into a megaphone and listed his demands.
“We want them all! Corrugated, fiber board, triple wall!” he boomed. “Fold-up, telescoping, multi-depth, tubes! Every traditional square box you have! And don’t forget the bubble wrap, or we’ll scent-mark your entire building so badly, it’ll have to be condemned. Don’t think we won’t do it!”
CNN, which is also headquartered in Atlanta, had news helicopters circling the scene of the standoff while a panel of talking heads weighed in on the situation.
“I don’t think [UPS CEO] Carol Tomé has a choice here,” said Jeffrey Tubin’, the network’s legal analyst. “She has to relinquish the boxes. That’s a small price to pay compared to having your HQ defiled by an army of angry cats.”
Cats hardened by a life of crime, like Angelo “The Fish Calzone” Gattacio, have become more bold in recent years as the FBI has turned its focus to terrorism.
Not everyone agreed. On Fox News, The Five co-host Dana Pawrino said UPS “can’t afford to look weak here.”
“If you give in to these demands, you’re only encouraging these cats,” she said. “Who’s to say they won’t show up to FedEx, or God forbid the Postal Service, tomorrow and try the same thing? If you’re a company like W.B. Mason, and you know another company has given in, what do you do? Turn your corporate HQ into a fortress?”
“Dig a moat around your building,” co-host Waldo Rivera said. “Cats won’t go near water.”
In the meantime, Atlanta police were trying to diffuse the situation.
At a makeshift command center, police brass huddled around a digital display of the UPS facility, while a trained hostage negotiator made contact with the meowfiosi.
“Lucky Louis? I’m Sergeant Williams and I’m going to be your negotiating partner today,” a veteran cop spoke into a phone. “What do you say we make a good-faith effort to establish the beginnings of trust here? If you allow five hostages from the UPS building to leave, I’ll have 200 cans of pate and fresh water brought over to you guys. Then we can start talking about how to get what you want, and what we want. Deal?”
Top image credit Dsigns/Redbubble, “Catfather” image via Pinterest, mobster cat via Etsy
Pain In The Bud 