The founders of a startup want Buddy to be the celebrity spokescat for their new product!
Dear Buddy,
We’re a group of entrepawneurs making all natural, delicious cat treats. Unlike humans, we know what cats want, which is why our treats aren’t made from chicken, salmon or beef — they’re all-natural, 100 percent mouse!
We’ve been talking about hiring a celebrity spokescat for our company, Of Mice and Meows, and we’d like to offer you the job!
What do you say, pal? You’ll be generously compensated in catnip and snacks!
Startup In San Diego
Dear San Diego,
It says here your product is only available in 14 stores and your total revenue for the last fiscal year was $476.23.
I just don’t see the logic in your valuation. Your idea is sound, but you’re entering a crowded market, and most of all the potential reward is not worth the risk that I’ll be taking on, especially if it eats into my 16 hour sleep cycles.
In addition to the scalability question, mouse is cool, but lack of turkey is not. And for those reasons, I’m out.
Frankie was surrendered at 13 years old and hasn’t had the easiest time adjusting to shelter life.
Even though I am the honored servant to the king, His Grace Buddy I, I am not immune to adoptable cats who tug at the heartstrings.
Frankie Sad Eyes is one of those cats. Just look at those eyes!
The little guy is 13 years old, and at an age when he should be enjoying a quiet, nap- and treat-filled life as the senior statesman among cats, he’s been surrendered by his people and has landed in a shelter.
Thankfully that shelter is Tabby’s Place, a no-kill, no-cage sanctuary in New Jersey that has a reputation for doing right by its cats. Still, any feline would be shocked by the experience of losing his or her family and ending up in a strange place with unfamiliar people and cats.
Frankie looks sad, and undoubtedly he’s finding it difficult adjusting to life in a sanctuary, but staff at Tabby’s Place say he’s a “joyful” cat with a zest for life.
Alas, I can’t adopt Frankie. Like the King himself, he’s not particularly keen on sharing his throne, so there can be no future where Buddy and Frankie are, well, buddies.
But Frankie, who is described as “a zesty, exuberant sweetheart” who still has kitten-like energy, is looking for a home where he can establish his new and forever kingdom, with a human or humans who will dote on him and see to his every need.
Visit Tabby’s Place to view their adoptable cats, make a donation or just brighten your day.
We’ll assume people who like to snooze with their furry buddies have normal cats. Buddy is not a normal cat.
Do you sleep better with your cat or dog in bed?
A significant majority of respondents in a recent survey said yes. British polling and survey firm OnePoll asked 2,000 Americans that question, with about 70 percent saying they get better rest with their furry friend next to them.
Most said having their cat or dog snoozing with them made them feel safer and more comfortable, while 58 percent admitted they sleep better with their pet in the bed than their significant other. While most people like having their animals sleep in their beds, some said pets could disrupt their sleep.
Of course if you’re like me, you never really had a choice. There was no adjustment period when I brought Buddy home for the first time. He didn’t hide under the bed and refuse to come out, or dash for the nearest small space.
That’s pedestrian behavior for a cat of his stature. Instead, the little guy came striding out of his carrier like a feline Genghis Khan and immediately started conquering territory.
“So this is my new bedroom, huh?” Buddy the Kitten seemed to say as he mewed excitedly. “Oh, look at this bed. Mine! Hey, that’s a sweet chair. Mine! I’m just gonna climb up onto your desk and survey my new territory if you don’t mind. The desk, by the way? Mine!”
He decided from the very beginning that my bed was his bed, and while I was to be his butler, waiter, masseur and personal groomer, I would also make a fine human mattress.
Thus our nightly routine: Buddy watches me impatiently as I get settled in bed, then makes himself comfortable either by draping himself over me, or wedging himself between my legs.
Readjusting and changing sleeping positions are severely frowned upon. I swear I can hear the annoyance in Bud’s voice, and his impatience as he waits for me to turn over so he can attend to what’s really important — his comfort.
“You should be deeply honored that I have deemed you acceptable to sleep upon. Now stop moving and don’t toss and turn during the night. I need my beauty sleep!”
Do I sleep better with him there? Mentally, yes. Physically, no.
Recently I wrote about his new habit of getting “sleep scritches,” which came about after he realized he could get me to raise my hand while I sleep. It took me a while to realize it was happening: At most I was dimly aware until I had a dream I was petting him, woke up and realized I was holding my hand up while Buddy was rubbing his face against my palm and purring happily.
He doesn’t wake me up for food, since I set aside a bowl of dry kibble and a bowl of fresh water for him before bed every night. If he gets hungry, he slides lazily off the bed, pads over to his little dining nook and quietly munches a snack before going back to sleep.
The little stinker’s proximity, and his tendency to meow in his sleep, also means he gate crashes my subconscious while I’m sleeping and appears in my dreams.
I can’t get away from him, but that’s okay with me.
Perhaps cats are reminding people that they rule the world.
More than four out of every five Zoom feeds are taken up by feline posteriors, a new study has found.
The research, “Felis Catus Rears In Online Meetings” was published this month in the Journal of Cats and Technology.
“With so many people working from home during the pandemic we had a wealth of data, including more than 400,000 hours of recorded Zoom meetings,” said Mo Muntervary, the study’s lead author. “Using a proprietary AI to analyze the data, we found that in approximately 332,000 hours of that footage, the Zoom meeting participants were either partly or completely obscured by the rear ends of their cats.”
Between March of 2020, when the US and Europe went into lockdown, and July of 2021, virtually every meeting in the information industries was run by participants looking at the behinds of their co-workers’ cats, the study found.
“I can pick my co-workers’ cats’ butts out of a police lineup,” said Yuzu Daimon, 32, a hospitality executive in Tokyo. “If I see a screen dominated by the behind of a chonky tuxedo, I know AI Imajo from creative has joined the meeting. If I see orange and black Bengal butt, I know it’s Hirotaro Tanaka in accounting.”
Some say they prefer the view over the normal dour expressions of colleagues working from home.
“Some of my best creative ideas of the past two years have come from staring at a screen full of cat butts,” said Luisa Rey, a writer for Spyglass Magazine in New York.
Conventional wisdom holds that cats park themselves in front of web cameras because they’re trying to draw the attention of their humans, but that may not be the case according to some experts.
“We have to consider the possibility that this is intentional on the part of felines,” said cat behaviorist Selina Kyle. “They may be trying to tell us they’re tired of people infringing on their alone time, when people were in the office before COVID changed everything. They may be looking to annoy us in retaliation for us annoying them, and if this is indeed a battle of annoyingness, then I’m afraid it’s a battle humankind cannot win. We are simply outgunned.”
A man says his girlfriend is worried his posts about his new kittens will embarrass her, and has demanded he take them down.
Is it “weird” and “creepy” to call yourself a cat dad?
One Redditor’s girlfriend thinks so, and didn’t hesitate to tell him. The 24-year-old poster says he’s had cats since he was 15 years old, and his current cat recently gave birth to a litter of kittens.
“I was so happy I took a pic and posted it online with the title saying that I’m now a cat dad for these cute kittens and that they’re my babies,” he wrote. “My post got lots of likes and reactions, but when my girlfriend saw it she picked a fight with me calling it cringe that I constantly refer to these kittens as my babies. She told me it’s just weird and lowkey creepy.”
The post comes from Reddit’s ever-flowing fount of entertainment, the subreddit known as “Am I The Asshole?“
In his version of the story, the Redditor says his girlfriend demanded he remove the post because she was worried it would cause her embarrassment with her friends. He refused, they argued, and she left to stay at a friend’s house to cool off.
The situation has not been resolved.
“We’re still fighting about it and she keeps on about how inconsiderate I am to keep doing something I know she’s uncomfortable with,” Mr. Cat Dad writes.
Credit: Tough Guys Holding Pets
The response among Redditors was overwhelmingly in favor of the poster, saying he’s emphatically “not the asshole.” Many responded with their own stories about cat dads, while others said the girlfriend was perpetuating harmful gender stereotypes.
“I feel sorry for your girlfriend,” a female poster wrote. “She has no joy in her heart and worried entirely too much about what other people think. Spoiler: nobody cares, live your best life.”
Keeping in mind these posts only tell one side of the story, it’s not unusual to hear about people who think men who like cats are weird, just like it’s pretty common to hear women called “crazy cat ladies.”
We don’t have that problem here at PITB, mostly because Bud is undeniably manly. If you saw a guy walking down the street with a tiger on a leash, you wouldn’t mess with him, would you? Well, Buddy’s indistinguishable from a tiger: same predatory gait, same intimidating and intense presence, same razor sharp claws and rippling meowscles.
I don’t call Bud my child or my son. He’s my Buddy. But if guys want to call themselves cat dads, who’s to say that’s a bad thing?
Pain In The Bud 