Conservationists Use Buddy’s Scent To Keep Big Cats Away From Livestock

Just a spritz of Essence of Buddy has been proven to send the most feared predators fleeing in terror.

KENYA – The formidable lion emerged from tangled brush and padded silently across a dirt road until he reached the shade of a large acacia tree.

He stopped dead in his tracks, nose wrinkled, mouth slightly ajar, and sampled the air as a small device attached to the tree trunk surreptitiously pumped aerosolized mist into the breeze.

Despite his previous determination to keep pushing forward and the bleating of sheep just a few hundred feet away, the colossal predator gave the air a final sniff, cowered in fear, then did an about-face and beat a hasty retreat.

What could cause an apex predator in its prime to willingly give up easy kills and flee in terror?

A unique pheromone, it turns out, from a legendary tabby cat in New York.

A scientist in a white lab coat, glasses, and blue gloves is writing in a notebook at a table. Various colorful liquids in glass containers are displayed on the table, with a chalkboard full of scientific formulas and diagrams in the background.
A chemist carefully synthesizes Buddesian pheromones. Credit: Vitaly Gariev/Pexels

Known as EoB, or Essence of Buddy, the pheromonal compound was successful in more than 95 percent of trials to keep big cats away from farms and ranches in Kenya, South Africa and Congo, according to a paper published this month in the Scholarly Journal of Apex Predators.

“Pheromones from rival lions, leopards, even bears and rhinos have efficacy rates ranging from just 20 percent to barely more than 50 percent,” study co-author Vito Commardo wrote. “But nothing compares to Essence of Buddy, which is nature’s equivalent of a warning sign emblazoned in neon. It says ‘Do not cross this boundary. Certain death awaits you if you do.'”

The miracle substance was discovered by chance when residents of a New York apartment building found their dogs refused to set paw on one floor. After eliminating a wide range of causes, a hunch led the building’s superintendent to call a zoologist friend. Using specialized equipment, the zoologist detected pheromones that were “off the charts.”

“It was incredible,” said wildlife biologist Jasper de Zoet. “The effect of Buddy’s pheromones is so powerful that merely stopping the elevator on his floor is enough to turn the largest, most aggressive dogs to whimpering, pitiful animals who soil themselves.”

In a test run at a local zoo, polar bears cowered in their cave when their habitat was sprayed with Essence of Buddy.

A victorious mixed martial artist celebrates in the ring, with one hand raised by the referee, surrounded by spectators and a camera crew.
Chael Sonnen’s opponent forfeited a match before the opening bell after smelling Buddy’s powerful pheromones. Credit: UFC

There’s even evidence EoB affects human behavior. The MMA fighter Chael Sonnen, looking for an edge in the Octagon, spritzed himself with the famed cat’s pheromones distilled in a cologne bottle. His opponent forfeited the match before the opening bell.

That prompted Buddy the Cat’s appearance on Joe Rogan’s podcast, where the feline sat stoically as Rogan questioned him and his assistants plied him with treats.

“We can’t have a cat of your status in the studio without asking you about UFOs because, bro, you’re totally an alpha,” Rogan told Buddy. “So what do you think of these new files about crashed ships and biologics?”

Buddy was silent for several seconds, then leaned into the microphone and said: “Mrrrrp!”

Rogan and his staff were bowled over.

“I knew it!” the podcaster said. “I knew it, bro! Jamie, type ‘mrrrrp’ into Google and find out what that means. Look that up.”

A close-up of a gray cat with green eyes, looking playfully up with its head tilted and front paws resting against a cushion.
Buddy, the feline who makes Earth’s mightiest creatures cower in fear, looking particularly intimidating in a candid shot.

While conservationists plan to use EoB to keep big cats away from ranches and farms, others have come knocking, including Secretary of War Pete Hegseth.

“We’re interested in synthesizing Essence of Buddy and combining it with mandatory testosterone shots to give our warriors that chiseled, strong-jawed look President Trump likes,” Hegseth told host Sean Hannity on Fox News. “And to give them an edge on the battlefield, of course.”

“Buddy is a great American,” Hannity replied.

“A great American,” Hegseth agreed.

Buddy himself could not be reached for this story. More than 20 calls were placed to his residence over the course of three days, but each time a man identified only as his “servant, butler and manager” said the popular feline was sleeping.

Point-Counterpoint: ‘I Am An Apex Predator!’ Vs ‘OMG, What Was That Noise?!? Go Check It Out, Human!’

Buddy the Cat asserts he is a powerful apex predator who fears no man or beast, while Buddy the Cat runs and hides the moment there’s an unfamiliar sound in his domicile.

I Am An Apex Predator!

Behold! I have the gait of a lion, the bite force of a tiger, the stealth of a jaguar, and the relentlessness of a leopard!

My meowscles ripple meowscularly as I stalk my prey by moonlight! One second all looks safe and calm, and the next I’m leaping from cover in a burst of feline power to ambush my unfortunate prey!

Lesser creatures have nightmares about me. Indigenous cultures celebrate my legend in oral traditions. Craftsmen carve bas reliefs illustrating my mastery over all beasts. Shamans invoke my speed and strength. My toys quake at the mere mention of my name!

I am Buddy, and I am a ferocious cat! RAWRRR!!!

‘OMG, What Was That Noise?!? Go Check It Out, Human!’

Holy crap, dude! What the heck was that?

I’m just gonna run and hide under the bed while you investigate that awful, terrifying noise! No, YOU check it out. Are you crazy? I’m not going anywhere near there! What if it’s, like, a serial killer or a chalupacabra?

Where’s it coming from? The kitchen? The bathroom? Oh God! I told you, there are monsters living in the toilet and they can emerge at any second to murder us in our naps! We should have nailed the toilet seat down years ago! You didn’t listen to me, so you’re gonna have to fend off the monsters while I lend you moral support from three rooms away.

What? Duuuude.

Was it really your smartphone alarm on vibrate? Whew! For a moment there, I thought we were in trouble.

Now I’m gonna need you to rub my head while I sit in your lap and you tell me what a good, brave boy I am. If it really had been monsters, they would have gotten their butts kicked by me. I was brave, wasn’t I?

If you slander me by claiming I freaked out and ran to hide under the bed, I will be forced to accuse you of peddling fake news!

Point-Counterpoint presents two essays taking opposing positions on a topic. Join us again next week, when Buddy the Cat will debate Buddy the Cat on another important topic.

Happy National Black Cat Day!

House cats, jaguars, leopards, Servals and jaguarundi are just some of the species that have melanistic (black) color morphs.

Everyone knows house cats, jaguars and leopards can be voids, but did you know other cats have black color morphs too?

The Asian golden cat, the Serval, jaguarundi, Margay, kodkod, Geoffrey’s cat, oncilla, Pampas cat, and bobcat all have melanistic variants.

Unfortunately when it comes to house cats, research supports the longstanding claim that black cats are adopted at lower rates, and are euthanized in greater numbers, than other felines. Part of that can be chalked up to superstition. It’s also due in part to the fact that black cats are more difficult to photograph.

But as these photos prove, all you need is some decent ambient light, smart framing and maybe a bit of shadow/highlight correction to help bring out a black cat’s natural features.

Melanistic kodkod.
Melanistic oncilla. Credit: Ignacio Yufera

Image credits: Top two rows via Pexels, with photographers listed in the captions. All other photos via Wikimedia Commons. Last image (melanistic oncilla) credit Ignacio Yufera

Facebook Is Flooded With Hoax Posts About A Supposed Black Mountain Lion

The purveyors of the deceptive posts want you to click, share and argue with other users about the veracity of the photos.

Not only is he the rarest puma in existence, he’s more well-traveled than most humans.

The mountain lion in question has a black coat, unprecedented for his species, and has been popping up all over Facebook. He’s photographed from the passenger seat of a truck cab, his tail in an unbothered curl, crouched amid the brush near a rural road.

Some posters claim they spotted the formidable feline in Mississippi. Others attribute the image to a sister-in-law who lives near Houston or a daughter in Charleston. A user in Louisiana claimed they took the photograph near the bayou, while another places the cat in Wyoming and claims he’s the first-ever documented “shadow cougar.” (Our friend Leah of Catwoods drew our attention to the images last week after seeing posts placing the cat in the south.)

In case it isn’t obvious, all the claims are full of it.

There is no such thing as a melanistic (black) mountain lion, and the big cat in the photo has the physical characteristics of a leopard, an animal that is not native to this hemisphere, let alone this continent.

The real story here is that Facebook remains a fountain of misinformation and Meta (its parent company) doesn’t care. Unscrupulous users will do anything to get attention and the clicks that come with it, and the average Facebook user is happy to indulge them, driving clicks by resharing the hoax content and juicing its algorithmic value by engaging in endless arguments with fellow users about the veracity and provenance of the photos.

Alleged big cat sightings are perfect for this sort of thing because they pique people’s natural curiosity, there’s a whiff of danger — especially when the poster claims the animal was spotted locally — and most people aren’t aware of telltale differences between cat species.

In many ways, the blurrier and more indeterminate the photo, the better: like Bigfoot and the Loch Ness monster, the idea of phantom cats is most fertile in the imagination.

These days you don’t even need a photo to get in on the click-baiting action. I asked Gemini to create an image of a jaguar-like big cat walking along a rural road at night, and this is what the LLM gave me:

In the image prompt, I asked it to make it look like an amateur photo taken with a midrange smartphone camera, but if we really wanted to get artistic, it’s simple enough to add noise, maybe some motion blur and digital artefacts to the image to make it look more like an authentically crappy, rushed shot of an unexpected animal.

Here’s the result of some simple efforts to en-crapify the “photo” further:

To give the image urgency and encourage people to engage with it, I can make it local and claim it was recent. Errors of grammar, spelling and punctuation add a nice seasoning of authenticity, along for feigned concern for others as the reason for sharing:

“Folks – just wanted to tell ya’ll to mind your pets an make sure of you’re surroundings bc theres a big cat on the lose!! my cousins GF took thus friday nite on Route 9 a few mile’s south of Dennies. a real honest to goodness black panther! BE SAFE!!!”

There’s a dangerous animal on the loose in your area! You know what you have to do: share it so others can bring their pets safely inside and stop their kids from playing outdoors, at least until it looks like the predator has moved on.

It’s your duty as a good American!

Since it doesn’t seem to matter if a quick reverse image search can settle the question of where an image came from, it’ll be interesting to see if anyone lifts the above image and text.

At the very least, maybe a few people who do think to run a search will find their way here, read about the hoax, and save themselves from getting drawn into online debates about the existence of cryptid cats.

Yes, That’s A Mountain Lion In Ring Cam Footage From NY! No, You’re Not In Danger

It’s the first time a mountain lion has been spotted in New York since 2011. Authorities aren’t sure if the cat is an escaped — and illegal — pet, or if it made an epic journey from the west coast.

For the first time in 14 years, there’s a puma on the loose in New York.

The wild cat was spotted on a Rochester woman’s Ring doorbell camera padding along the sidewalk in front of her home at about 4 am on Wednesday morning.

A representative from the state Department of Environmental Conservation cautiously said the agency is working on confirming the species of cat in the footage.

But the feline’s size, gait and tail are dead giveaways, despite the dark footage and fleeting glimpse: it’s a puma.

In the brief clip, the wild feline walks past a tree, giving the DEC an important context clue. Michael Palermo, a wildlife manager with the department, said his team measured the tree, allowing them to closely estimate the animal’s size by comparing the footage to their measurements.

“If, in fact, it is some large cat, we would want to question, how did it get here? It’s not impossible for a wild cougar to travel to New York; it’s happened before,” Palermo said. “Was it a captive one that may have been legal as a licensed facility, and if so, did it escape? We still need to do some work to verify anything like that.”

While pumas were once native to New York and thrived in the forested mountains of regions like the Catskills (“cat creek” in Dutch), the last verified sighting in New York was in 2011. That cougar crossed through the Empire State after an epic journey from the west coast, a stronghold for the species.

Some people who posted to a Rochester community group on Facebook are already freaking out, and pumas are widely misunderstood, so it’s important to note the facts:

  • Pumas are not African lions, are not closely related to them and do not behave like them
  • They’re not aggressive toward people. In fact, they try to stay away from humans and will go out of their way to avoid confrontation
  • The exceptions are when people threaten a puma’s cubs or corner the animal, giving it no opportunity to escape
  • Americans are 150 times more likely to be struck by lightning than killed by a puma. There are only 27 reported cases of people killed by pumas in more than a century. By contrast, an estimated 4,300 to 10,000 Americans have been killed by dogs in that same time span. (Higher estimates include people who did not die immediately from dog bites, and people who died of infections or complications from bites.)
  • While some people and media reports erroneously call pumas “big cats,” they are not members of the panthera genus. They are felines more closely related to domestic cats and small wildcats. Accordingly, pumas can purr and meow, but they cannot roar

Pumas are also known as mountain lions, cougars, panthers, painters, screamers, catamounts, pangui, onca parda, cuguacuarana, katalgar, chimbica, shunta-haska, fire cats, California lions, ghost cats, and red tigers, among many other names.

In fact, the species has more names than any other animal. That’s because it’s adaptable with a historically wide and varied range. There are some 40 names for pumas in English and more than 80 in Spanish, Portuguese and the languages of indigenous Native American tribes.

The species is officially known as puma concolor, or “puma of one color” thanks to its typically biege fur that, unlike tigers, jaguars, leopards and even house cats, does not have stripes, spots or rosettes.

While it’s extremely unlikely the mystery cougar would pose a threat to people, Rochester police — who have fielded several reports of sightings in recent days — advise locals to keep their pets indoors and to exercise caution while walking their dogs.

Update: The DEC has officially confirmed the cat is a puma, although it was obvious from the footage.

In the meantime, a Rochester man says he saw the wild cat — and people running away from it — on Wednesday night.

Although that sighting has not been substantiated by authorities, it does illustrate the need to educate the public about these animals.

“You know, a mountain lion, it be ‘rawr.’ They be crawling and… serious,” Curtis Jones told WHAM, an ABC affiliate in Rochester.

“I am going to keep this bat right here, man, just in case,” he told a TV reporter. “I am going to protect us, I ain’t going to let nothing happen to us, nothing. OK?”

Let’s hope common sense somehow finds its way into the Facebook algorithm amid all the misinformation as the locals discuss the sightings online.

If you’re from the area, we beg you: please do not attack, shoot or chase after the puma with a baseball bat. The animal does not consider you food, is not a danger to you, and is probably scared and hungry.

That deserves special emphasis if, as the DEC’s staff have said, the puma is more likely an escaped captive than a long-wandering traveler from the western US.

Jones said he saw the puma “slithering” and hear it “rawr,” but it’s worth noting, again, that pumas are members of the genus felinae, meaning they’re genetically and behaviorally much closer to house cats and can meow and purr, but cannot roar. Despite their size, mountain lions are not true “big cats.”

As for Jones, we hope him and his neighbors give the cat a wide berth and let the authorities safely capture it, have a veterinarian evaluate, and figure out where it belongs.

“I don’t play with lions, I don’t play with tigers, bears, nothing in the wild, I don’t play with those, I promise you,” Jones told the station. “I don’t even do rollercoasters. I’m good.”