Buddy the Cat – Page 32 – Pain In The Bud

Buddy And I Will Be Right Back!

Big Buddy is convalescing with the help of our hero, Little Buddy.

Hello admirers of the most handsome and meowscular cat in the world!

I’ve gotten some messages from people asking if Bud and I are okay and just wanted to let you know we are, and we’ll be back soon.

I planned a brief hiatus, no more than a few days to recharge the creative batteries. That hiatus was extended when I flew to Washington to hang out with my brother, his wife and the kiddos.

Then I returned home, assisted with a family emergency, got sick shortly afterward and tested positive for COVID.

It feels kind of strange to have lived through the original COVID wave that brutalized New York in 2020, as well as the subsequent delta and omicron waves, managing to avoid infection only to get COVID now in the summer of 2023. But if getting it was inevitable, I’m grateful it happened after I’ve been vaccinated and boosted, and not in those chaotic, horrific early waves when doctors weren’t sure what they were dealing with.

COVID hit me hard, like an extremely intense flu with a grab bag of other symptoms thrown in for good measure, but I’m very grateful I haven’t suffered major upper respiratory distress. Likewise, I’m grateful that my congenital heart problem — an extremely rare valve deformation — was not a factor, because that was my biggest worry.

I am aware that cats can catch COVID, and in the back of my mind I always imagined quarantining myself from Buddy if I came down with it, but cats have their own plans for things and Bud, who is already famously intolerant of any distance or closed doors between us, has a longstanding policy of never leaving my side when I’m sick. Quarantining from Bud was not an option. There’s no way to communicate the why of it to him, and on the practical side I have not had the energy to cordon him off, assuming that’s even possible. Knowing him, he’d quickly find a way to circumvent any barriers and, failing that, he’d meow incessantly and refuse to allow me a minute’s peace until this farce (“Closed doors between us, can you believe it?!?”) was ended.

Just one more reason to love the little guy and be grateful for him, but of course I’ll be watching him closely.

For now I’ll be happy to see the other side of this. Getting really sick is always a good reminder to be grateful for health, and in particular this experience helped me understand that despite vaccines, masks, air filters, hand sanitizers and careful behavior, so much is left to chance.

So that’s what’s happening here. I apologize for our extended absence, and I look forward to returning to our regularly scheduled cat content — same Buddy time, same Buddy channel — in the near future.

New Crypto Currency ‘BuddyCoin’ Takes Financial World By Storm

Buddy the Cat tries his paw at cryptocurrency in his latest scheme to get more turkey and become filthy rich.

NEW YORK — Despite recent volatility in the cryptocurrency market, investors are rushing back thanks to the newest and most promising digital currency, BuddyCoin.

“Buddy coin, like, leverages assets and annuities and stuff, and then it takes advantage of cyberbond yields in the arbitrage market to leverage incredible profits,” Buddy the Cat explained during a conference call with investors.

Whereas other coins were tethered to startups run by tech bros or susceptible to major price fluctuations dependent on the banking industry, BuddyCoin was “built from the ground up to be resilient,” its founder said.

“We empower our clients by highlighting our core competency through scalable synergies, giving us the bandwidth to grow our brand and our coins,” the gray tabby cat said. “This leads to enormous profits because, like, they get more profitable and stuff. We pride ourselves on our ability to drill down into the financials, taking a deep dive via blue sky thinking and, uh, synergize and streamline the efficiencies in emerging markets through our product.”

Buddy Coin Crypto — BuddyCoin has been the hottest cryptocurrency of late, turning Buddy into the world’s first feline crypto king.

Buddy, who serves as founder and CEO of BuddyCoin’s parent company, Money4Buddy (MFB/Nasdaq), has been clearing hurdles to buy the largest turkey farm in North America and has been actively courting investors to help bankroll his attempt to take over several major players in the pet food and poultry markets.

The business-minded feline has also accrued assets in laser technology, a company that manufactures can openers, and several nutritional supplements labs, which have been repurposed to research supplements intended for felines despite market analysts saying there is little to no demand.

“When’s the last time you saw a cat lifting weights or running on a treadmill?” said one analyst who spoke on condition of anonymity.

A market expert from another firm cast doubt on the future of BuddyCoin.

“Have you heard Buddy talk about this stuff?” the cryptocurrency analyst asked. “None of it makes any sense. This is clearly a scam by a well-fed cat to become even more well-fed.”

Buddy ended his call with investors by trying to rally them to his cause.

“BuddyCoin is only going to get more valuable because we leverage our key priorities to push the envelope with lots of moving parts, which helps grow our portfolios,” he said. “Also, I really like turkey, so give me your money. Thank you.”

Above: Paper currency from the feline world: A 10 cat dollar note, top left, a 00 cat dollar note, etc. Unlike human currency, cat dollars come in every conceivable denomination because cats don’t have pockets to carry change.

He Is…The Most Interesting Cat In The World

Buddy prepares to become the new face of an iconic ad campaign.

Big things are happening within the Buddyverse, my friends, and to give you a taste of what’s to come, here’s a short audio clip of a new campaign featuring Buddy, who has signed a deal to become a beer spokesman. (Terms of the deal were not disclosed, but reports claim a significant sum of catnip and beer changed hands.)

Buddy’s deal involves four ad spots, which will be released over the coming weeks.

Stay thirsty, my friends.

Yes, It’s Safe For Your Feline Friend To Eat Catnip

It turns out catnip has a different effect when cats eat it instead of sniffing and rolling around in it.

Is it safe for a cat to eat catnip, and does eating it instead of sniffing it make any difference to the kitty?

I wondered about that while watching Buddy enthusiastically lap up some silver vine and ‘nip yesterday afternoon before he drifted off to nirvana.

If you’re worried about whether it’s safe, don’t be. While most cats tend to sniff or roll around in the stuff, there’s nothing in catnip that can harm them according to veterinarians.

The worst that can happen is a mild stomach ache from eating too much of the good stuff.

As for whether ingesting vs sniffing makes any difference, it turns out it does.

When catnip hits the olfactory receptors, it works as a stimulant, prompting energetic, playful behavior.

But when it’s ingested, catnip has the opposite effect, working as a sedative. Felines who eat the ‘nip become more relaxed, often drooling or drifting off for a nap.

Buddy on catnip — “I think…I’m pretty sure I’m feeling it. Oh yeah! Break out the laser pointer and the snacks!”

That makes perfect sense given my own observations. As a feline who eats catnip, Bud will still play, but he’s lazy about it. Instead of ambushing and tackling his wand toys he’ll just pad up to them, drop to the floor and lazily paw at the plush toys at the end of the string, occasionally biting or rabbit-kicking them.

When all else fails, the laser gets him moving.

Regardless of whether your cat sniffs or eats the good stuff, the effects are relatively short-lived and wear off after about 15 minutes.

Catnip is safe for your furry friends and it’s a great way to help make an indoor cat’s life more exciting.

Buddy Wants YOU To Adopt A Kitty: Adopt A Cat Month 2023

Ever year, 3.2 million little buddies enter shelters across the US, hoping for forever homes and humans to love them.

A message from Buddy, Purrsident of the Americats:

June is national Adopt A Cat Month here in our great country, and it’s no coincidence that it coincides with kitten season when hundreds of thousands of little buddies are born.

Those babies will need forever homes and attentive human servants to see to their needs, but don’t forget the adult buddies in your local shelter! They need homes too, and if you like to keep things low key, they’re the buddies for you. Bonus: They come pre-installed with purrsonalities, so there’s less guesswork involved if you’re adding a new living room lion to your existing pride.

Just remember, June is ADOPT a cat month, not “buy a cat from a breeder” month! When you adopt a cat, you’re making a friend for life who will be forever grateful to you…although kitty will still expect you to be a good servant, because that is the natural order of things!

Do you patriotic duty and adopt an Americat!

Purrsident Buddy