Tag: ancient Egypt

Worship Us, Oh Puny Humans!

Pain In The Bud

Dear Buddy,

Did you hear the news about the cat mummies and the big trove of cat statues found by archaeologists in Egypt? My dad says Egypt is a special place ‘cause that’s where humans used to worship us a long time ago. Is that true? Why did they stop?

Kitten in Kentucky


Dear KiK,

Your dad is right! Egypt is a magical land, a place where humans were once keenly aware of our status as the most awesome species on Earth.

Egypt is where you’ll find the biggest litter box on the planet. It stretches for miles and miles until finally the horizon reveals a huge weather-worn statue of a cat and three stone pyramids jutting out of the litter.

The Great Sphinx and Pyramids of GizaThe Great Sphinx of Giza keeps watch over the world’s most sacred litter box.

It is said that by pooping in front of the Great Sphinx and reverently burying…

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Dear Buddy: How’d You Get Your Name?

Dear Buddy,

How’d you get your name?

Cool Cat in Cleveland


Dear Cool Cat,

My servant tells me my name is one of great distinction in Humanese, conferred only on those of spectacular repute.

For example there was the renowned Pharaoh, Buddeses II, who oversaw the construction of the Great Sphinx. In Italy, Buddissimo of Naples achieved worldwide fame for his paintings, his numerous inventions and his delicious stone-baked pepperoni pizzas.

In the 17th century Sir Buddington the Bold, Earl of Budderset, was famed for his exploits as an explorer, while Count Buddeaux of Marseilles was known as a playboy, an expert defenestrator and the father of pâté.

In ancient Greece, Buddimedes the Spartan was one of the famous 300 warriors who, under the command of the great cat Leonidas, kept a horde of a million Persians from crossing the narrow pass at Thermopylae. They say the distressed meows of those Persians could be heard for miles as the Spartans pushed them into the sea, where they were forced to catch dinner themselves instead of having tins opened for them.

The name was also popular in Japan, especially among skilled swordsmen like the legendary Buddimoto Mewsashi.

More recently there was Buddy Holly, Buddy Guy and Buddy Miles, musicians all. (I play a bit of guitar myself, reaching out to pluck strings when Big Buddy is strumming away on his axe.)

I’ve often thought about my own legacy in the pantheon of Buddies.

Will I be known as Buddy the Eloquent in honor of my skill with language? Perhaps Buddy the Beefcake in recognition of my muscular physique? Or maybe something modest like Buddy the Brave for my legendary fearlessness?

My human didn’t choose my name, it simply manifested as it became clear I am the next Great Buddy.

I feel the power and the importance of this lineage every day, and it gives me motivation to be the greatest cat I can be.

That means I don’t do anything half-assed, including napping. My Big Buddy says I have elevated napping to an art form. Perhaps history will remember me as Buddy the Magnificent Napper.

Your friend,

Buddy the Cat

PhotoFunia-1612095051