Category: turkey

Beware Of Cat!

Want to dissuade criminals from targeting your home but can’t afford a fancy security system? A warning sign featuring Buddy’s terrifying visage will do!

Times are tough, everyone’s feeling the squeeze, and criminals are more motivated than ever to target homes that may have valuables in them.

That’s why Buddy, in the spirit of altruism (and the guarantee of extra turkey) agreed to lend his fierce likeness to the below poster. According to the Buddinese Center For Criminal Justice, homeowners who display this “BEWARE OF CAT” sign are 99% less likely to be the victims of home robbery or burglary, as criminals will simply move on to a home that isn’t protected by an intimidating, extremely ripped feline:

Alternate version with even more intimidating image of feline protector:

Captain Buddy Is Back For His Most Delicious Adventure Yet!

An old enemy lies in wait in the far reaches of the galaxy, ready to exact revenge on the most dashing, clever and dashingly clever captain in Starfleet!

ALPHA QUADRANT, Milky Way Galaxy — Captain Buddy is back for his most thrilling, treacherous and scrumptious adventure yet!

As the commanding officer of the USS Fowl Play and a legend within the galactic community, Captain Buddy and his trusty crew get the call to investigate reports of the malevolent Borg raiding colonies on the edge of Federation space.

Our intrepid captain arrives just in time to fend off a Borg cube attacking Dawn’s Edge, one of the largest colonies on the Felinian Rim. After mounting a heroic defense and defeating the diabolical enemy spacecraft, brave Captain Buddy discovers the Borg weren’t just trying to assimilate the peaceful Caitians living in the colony: they were after the colonist’s turkey, tuna and dilithium reserves as well!

With reinforcements several days away, Captain Buddy is tasked with defending the colony, reassuring terrified colonists, and managing a dwindling supply of sandwiches and snacks…

Wordless Wednesday: A Feline Of Many Talents

Buddy has worn many hats in his time, literally and figuratively. He’s a good boy!

In 2019, Buddy was called up to the Yankees from AAA Scranton in place of the injured Giancarlo Stanton. Batting behind team captain Aaron Judge, Buddy hit a terrific .328 with 117 runs, while his jersey became the top seller in the team’s official store.

Sgt. Buddy in his USMC dress blues.

In 2015, Buddy was promoted to the rank of sergeant (E-5) in the US Marine Corps, where he served as a drill instructor at Marine Corps Recruit Depot on Parris Island, South Carolina. A tough but fair DI, Buddy churned out some of the Corps’ finest Marines while pioneering new hand-to-paw combat techniques.

In 1627, Buddy ascended the Phoenix Throne of the Joseon dynasty, earning him the title “Jeonha,” or king. Jeonha Buddy led Joseon through a period of post-war turmoil and into recovery while also establishing trade eastward with a previously-unknown culture that raised a magnificent bird known as turkey.

In 2023, Buddy was chosen as the face of Armani’s newest line of sleek suits, cutting a dapper figure on the runway.

Happy Valentine’s Day From The Fabio Of Cats

Little Buddy’s special Valentine’s Day message!

Whether you’re staying home on Valentine’s Day or spending it with your longtime significant other, there’s reason to celebrate with this special Valentine’s Day message from Little Buddy.

Lounging like the Fabio of cats, locking onto the camera with his soulful green eyes, Buddy embodies the romantic aspect of the holiday.

Valentine’s Day With Buddy the Cat

Already a major heartthrob to felines all over the world, Buddy is guaranteed to set human hearts fluttering as well with his meowscular good looks and remarkable charm.

Gaze upon this Adonis of Cats, ye mighty, and tremble!

Buddy the Cupid!

And finally, if you already have enough little buddies in your life, Buddy the Cupid will help you find your significant other…for a nominal fee of canned turkey pate and only during hours not designated for nap time, of course.

Happy Valentine’s Day!