Beware Of Cat!

Want to dissuade criminals from targeting your home but can’t afford a fancy security system? A warning sign featuring Buddy’s terrifying visage will do!

Times are tough, everyone’s feeling the squeeze, and criminals are more motivated than ever to target homes that may have valuables in them.

That’s why Buddy, in the spirit of altruism (and the guarantee of extra turkey) agreed to lend his fierce likeness to the below poster. According to the Buddinese Center For Criminal Justice, homeowners who display this “BEWARE OF CAT” sign are 99% less likely to be the victims of home robbery or burglary, as criminals will simply move on to a home that isn’t protected by an intimidating, extremely ripped feline:

Alternate version with even more intimidating image of feline protector:

11 thoughts on “Beware Of Cat!”

  1. I see an opportunity for a booming cat security business for Buddy! I see him gathering up similarly ripped minions to protect homes from criminal CATastrophy!

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    1. His terrifying likeness alone should be enough to dissuade criminals, dogs and other undesirables, but for the right price in turkey and treats, he’ll be happy to nap-guard for clients.

      I can’t remember where I read it, but some king or emperor did try to protect his palace with tigers IIRC, and learned the hard way that if the tigers are given a nice big meal, they’ll go for a snooze and happily ignore the trespassers who just fed them.

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    1. He’d either pretend he’s asleep, like he did with the mouse that time, or he’d hide behind my legs and give away our position by moaning lol.

      The other day he meowed in his sleep. He was draped on top of me like he always is, and I heard “Bruppabup! Yaaarf!” in his Elmo voice. It was all I could do to stifle my laughs so as not to wake him up.

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