Category: Buddy

Interview With Buddy, The Cat Who Saved A Dog From Two Coyotes

Buddy has been hailed as a hero after he valorously fought off two coyotes to save his dog friend.

Many thousands of Americans have heard the now-viral story about a cat who saved a dog from a vicious coyote attack, but did you know that fearless feline is none other than Buddy the Cat?

We were lucky enough to catch up with Buddy and interview him about his famous feat of extraordinary bravery, as well as what life’s like for him now that he’s become a feline celebrity.

Q: First of all, thanks for speaking to us. We know you’ve got a lot of interview requests and you’re so hot right now, so we appreciate you taking the time.

Buddy: Anytime. It’s true, so many people want a piece of Buddy the Brave these days that it’s beginning to mess with my napping schedule, but I think it’s important to speak out on topics like this.

Q: Well said! So why don’t you take us through the chain of events. What preceded this vicious coyote attack, and how did you become involved?

Buddy: Well I was visiting my friend — and yes, cats can be friends with inferior animals like dogs! — when I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. I have incredible vision, as you know. And as the coyotes were sneaking up I just kind of raised a paw and flexed my bicep. Usually that’s enough to make ’em think twice, you know?

Q: But these coyotes didn’t heed your warning?

Buddy: Unfortunately, no. They were licking their lips and set on attacking my buddy, and Buddy does not take kindly to anyone attacking my buddies, you know what I mean?

Q: Those coyotes clearly didn’t know who they were dealing with. So that’s when they attacked?

Buddy: Exactly. For a hot second I was in shock, you know? I’m thinking ‘Did they not just see me flex? Is it possible they didn’t see how ripped I am?’ But then I heard my friend yelp in pain and I just sprang into action without regard for my own safety.

Q: That’s very heroic of you.

Buddy: Isn’t it?

Q: So what would you say to detractors who claim the cat in the video has black fur and is not a gray tabby?

Buddy: They’re conspiracy theorists, like people who think the Earth is hexagonal and Big Catnip is out to get kitties hooked. You know, it’s a black and white security camera, and I move so fast that I’m a blur, so I can understand how people are confused.

Q: And the people who claim this happened in Oklahoma?

Buddy: Fake news. Obviously it happened in New York.

Q: Obviously. Well we don’t want to take any more of your precious time, but we just want to thank you, Buddy. You’re a real Americat hero!

Buddy: Yes I am!

Festivus 2023: Little Buddy Has Grievances, People!

Today is a Festivus for the rest of us! Get out tbe Festivus pole and prepare for the Feats of Strength and the Airing of Grievances!

Happy Festivus!

December 23 marks the famously anti-consumerist holiday, and this year is the 27th Festivus since it became a national holiday thanks to the Seinfeld episode “The Strike,” which aired on Dec. 18, 1997.

Before that, it was the invention and personal holiday of Daniel O’Keefe, a Reader’s Digest editor. His son Dan, a writer for Seinfeld, introduced Festivus to the rest of us by making it a focal point of the episode.

Festivus is enthusiastically celebrated at la casa de Buddy, providing Little Buddy the opportunity to engage in the Airing of Grievances and, as is tradition, tell everyone how they’ve disappointed him over the past year.

Buddy the Cat with George, Elaine, Jerry and Kramer in the season five episode “The Litter Box.” In the episode, Buddy, Kramer and Kramer’s friend Bob Saccamano scheme to charge felines entry to the beach, billing it as a “luxury litter box.”

With that, we’ll turn it over to Little Buddy’s list of Grievances. No one is spared.

Big Buddy: For being insufficiently devastated when I got sick a few months ago. I expected more tears. Do better next time.

PITB readers: It has recently come to my attention that some of you are laughing at me, not with me. This disturbing news has caused me to question whether you’re being honest when you send correspondence praising my ripped physique or insisting I should be president of the Americats again.

The Internet: For not making me as famous as I should be.

Big Buddy: For being a vegetarian and not having extra turkey in the house!

Big Buddy and PITB readers (again) for tolerating stories about non-cat species and cats who aren’t Buddy! Who cares about owls in Central Park and chonky cats in Poland? This is littlebuddythecat.com NOT fatpolishcats.com!

Dear Buddy: Why Do Humans Watch Horror Movies?

Dear Buddy,

What’s with these horror movies? My human likes to curl up on the couch under a blanket, with me protectively in her lap of course, and watch these ghastly movies about serial killers, ghost infestations and lurking monsters.

Why would anyone want to scare themselves? You don’t see us creating an entire film genre dedicated to horrors like empty food bowls or late dinners, so why do humans make these movies?

Your fan,
Mildly Curious in Manhattan

Dear Mildly Curious,

This is a question I’ve pondered for some time, inasmuch as I care about anything human-related to ponder. My human also watches those movies and he also does so with me sitting protectively in his lap.

Then I realized something. None of the people in these horror movies have cats!

The family from The Conjuring? They have a dog. Stanley Tucci’s family in that crappy movie about flying monsters that kill everyone? Dog! The family in that other crappy movie about giant axolotl-type things that terrorize people living in a coastal community?

You guessed it! They have a dog too.

You see where I’m going with this, right? Humans who serve us cats literally have no fear because no monster or crazy cereal killer would ever risk attacking a home with a cat in it.

Suppose a hungry evil monster is let loose in my neighborhood and is making its way through the street at night, then sees me in all my meowscular, intimidating, tigeresque glory sitting at the window, keeping watch over the nocturnal world.

That monster is going to skip right over The Buddy Domicile and go in search of easier pickings because it sure as heck doesn’t want to tangle with me and my claws. I have that effect on monsters.

They may be monsters, but they’re not stupid. Breaking into a home with a cat is like breaking into a t-rex enclosure. You’re asking to get mauled by a huge, meowscular apex predator who will eviscerate you and look handsome and badass while doing it.

People who serve us cats know this. They know no monster or killer or robber would be stupid enough to go near a house with a cat. They can probably sense my meowscularity two miles away!

So sometimes our humans may want to know what it feels like to be vulnerable, what it would be like if they didn’t have tigers like us guaranteeing that no intruder approaches. THAT is why they watch horror movies. Take it to the bank!

Your genius friend,

Buddy the Cat

Buddy’s Cat Café Offers Cat Lovers A Chance To Pet And Feed Buddy

Buddy the Cat’s latest scheme makes him the main — and only — attraction at a new cat cafe, where customers fuss over him and feed him all day.

NEW YORK — The Big Apple’s newest cat cafe is doing a brisk business, offering cat lovers a new twist on the relaxing feline-and-coffee combo.

Instead of a typical cat cafe which could feature a dozen or more adoptable cats to interact with, Buddy’s Café and Catnip Lounge features one cat: Buddy, its proprietor.

For just $5 customers can come inside, enjoy a cup of coffee and spend their time petting and feeding Buddy. A separate menu offers a range of treats and catnip products which they can purchase to lavish on the gray tabby cat.

“It’s not easy being a one-cat operation, but I’m dedicated to my customers by making sure they can feed me and pet me as much as they want,” Buddy said as the cafe began to fill up.

buddyhiphop
Buddy posing with regulars for Freestyle Fridays at Buddy’s Cat Cafe. Many young musicians come to Buddy for advice, as well as to pet and feed him.

By late afternoon several groups were seated at tables situated around a dais where Buddy stretched and yawned on a Roman-style chaise longue.

“Please, ladies, there’s enough of me to go around,” Buddy told a pair of customers who were arguing over which one of them was petting the feline first. “Sandra, why don’t you scratch behind my ears? Ah, that’s wonderful! Kim, my chin is free for scritches. Yes. You see? We can all get along.”

buddycatcafecrowd
Buddy with students from Mrs. Nakamura’s fourth-grade class. The students come to Buddy’s Cat Cafe once a month to visit, feed and fawn over their feline friend.

Buddy was able to prevent another argument when he announced he needed to use his litter box and four customers volunteered to carry him there. He gestured toward a gilded palanquin in the corner of the room which was carved with elaborate feline motifs.

“You can each take a corner and carry me,” he said, settling himself down on the palanquin’s cushion. “You are all privileged today, my human servants.”

Buddy’s Cat Café even offers a VIP-tier membership package, the Frequent Feeder Program. Frequent Feeders are given priority seating closest to Buddy and are the first permitted to feed him snacks and give him massages during the afternoon rush.

“Buddy so kawaii!” said one admirer, Hideshi Igawa. “I like to read shinbun and admire Budditsu.”

Not everything always runs smoothly at the cafe, however. Earlier this week a man entered claiming to be “Buddy’s human” and demanded the beloved feline “stop this ridiculousness and come home.” Buddy looked skeptically at the man and pretended not to know him.

“Sir, you’re going to have to buy a cup of coffee like everyone else and wait your turn,” said 27-year-old Kelly Hogan, a regular at the cafe. “Buddy, do you know this man?”

Buddy looked at his Big Buddy and pretended not to recognize him.

“I don’t,” he said. “Security, toss this troublemaker out! He’s trying to cut the line, and I won’t have my regular customers disturbed!”

Big Buddy screamed at his cat as two burly men dragged him out.

“I’ll get you for this, you little $#!+!” he yelled as the men tossed him out the front door. “No bed, no snuggles, no TURKEY!”

Buddy turned back toward his customers and cleared his throat.

“Where were we? Ah, yes. Little Jeffrey here was scratching my back, his mother was feeding me crunchy treats, and Mrs. Novello was next up with a bag of catnip. Let’s get back into it, shall we? People are waiting patiently!”