Is Giving ‘Nip To Your Cat The Equivalent Of Handing A Beer To A Toddler?

If cats are like small children emotionally and intellectually, is it ethical to give them a mind-altering drug?

That’s a question posed in a new article in The Conversation, and it’s something I’ve never really considered before.

It’s generally accepted that our little buddies are more or less equivalent to small children in terms of intellect and emotional intelligence. In fact kittens develop much more quickly than human children and come to certain understandings — like theory of mind and object permanence — considerably earlier than young kids do.

They also seem to possess some sapient qualities. My niece was born a year before Bud, for example, but in their early interactions he understood she was still developing motor skills and did not intend to cause him harm. I have photos of a young Buddy, still a kitten, cautiously allowing her to touch his fur and being uncharacteristically gentle with her.

There’s growing evidence that pet cats are “kittens in perpetuity.” Not only do their behaviors toward us mirror their behaviors toward their mothers — like meowing and using us as a “secure base” when faced with uncertainties — but they depend on us completely. We care for them, in turn, at least in part because they have neotenous (baby-like) features, which trigger our protective instincts.

Bud is basically a “kid,” so is it ethical for me to give him a potentially mind-altering substance?

Catnip isn’t really a drug

While some catnip companies lean into the whole “marijuana for cats” thing, naming catnip after famous marijuana strains, selling it in gag pharmaceutical bottles and even calling themselves “dispensaries,” those are marketing efforts aimed at us servants. As the authors note, it’s not accurate to consider catnip the equivalent of a drug.

It’s not physically addictive, its effects only last a few minutes and cats can’t overdose on the stuff. In fact the primary “danger” of giving too much catnip is your four-legged friend getting desensitized completely to the effect, which is why it’s an occasional treat, not a routine pick-me-up.

Meowijuana Catnip Company really leans into the whole “weed for cats” thing with catnip packaged like marijuana.

Catnip “won’t induce psychosis and won’t lead to addiction or withdrawal symptoms,” wrote authors Anne Quain, a professor of veterinary science at the University of Sydney, and Mia Cobb, a research fellow at the University of Melbourne’s Animal Welfare Science center.

We don’t have to worry about cats driving on the stuff, and they have no responsibilities to speak of so catnip and silver vine can’t impact important decisions. If they have any deleterious social effects, they end at making our furry friends drool, look silly and rendering them even more drowsy than usual.

The mysteries of the nip effect

But what about a kitty’s subjective experience? How does catnip make your feline overlord feel?

We don’t have a very good answer to that question other than what we can observe, which is that they love the stuff. (Some cats don’t respond to catnip but are put in a state of bliss by silvervine. Some respond to both. A small number may not derive much pleasure from either of the plants.)

Even when they aren’t technically impacted by it, cats seem intrigued by the scent and use their secondary olfactory receptor, the vomeronasal organ, to do that odd-looking “mouth-sniffing” thing they do.

Buddy loves catnip and silver vine. I keep his ‘nip in an out-of-reach cabinet, inside a sealed container, which is itself inside an air-tight plastic bag. Bud can be in a deep sleep yet within seconds of opening it he’ll appear like an overly enthusiastic djinn who thinks the wish thing works in reverse, meowing impatiently and trilling with anticipation as I set the good stuff down for him.

That’s as close to consent as we’re going to get from cats, and I think we can safely conclude Bud’s response is “Hell yes! Gimme that sweet ‘nip and silver vine blend!”

He gobbles the stuff down, by the way, so YMMV on your feline overlord’s reaction. The conventional wisdom is that cats who sniff catnip get more animated while cats who eat it tend to roll around in bliss and meow.

Making life more interesting for your fuzzy liege lord

Which brings us to the final point: catnip and silver vine are ultimately enrichment tools that help make indoor life more exciting for our little buddies, like toys, cat furniture, boxes, intriguing smells and most importantly, time playing with us.

We don’t talk about it enough, but keeping our cats stimulated and happy indoors is important, especially as pressure mounts for everyone to keep their felines inside. If your local area isn’t enforcing curfews and outright bans, it seems only a matter of time before they follow states in Australia, New Zealand and Europe in passing new laws. Every day there are news articles detailing the efforts of city councils and town boards to deal with outdoor, unmanaged feline populations, and it’s a safe bet that most of those elected officials will not have the welfare of the animals high on their list of priorities.

If we want to avoid cruelty toward cats, getting our own pets comfortable with living indoors is a good first step to making sure government doesn’t become involved.

A happy cat with a huge stash of the good stuff.

Trimming Cat Claws Still Sucks

The promise of a revolutionary new method of claw trimming is all hype, sadly.

I was hyped when I saw the headline.

“Cat Owners Rejoice,” the Newsweek headline blares. “Science Can Make Trimming Claws Less Stressful.”

Well if cat owners are rejoicing, it’s gotta be amazing, yeah?

I imagined cat affionados feting the creator of some miraculous new device that keeps cats comfortably restrained and relaxed, or maybe celebrating the discovery of some previously-unknown sound frequency that lulls felines into such a state of carefree bliss that they purr contentedly while we carefully clip their claws.

What I didn’t expect was a “protocol” that amounts to: Touch your cat’s leg. If he doesn’t try to murder you, touch your cat’s paw. If he still doesn’t murder you, trim a single claw. Repeat steps the next time your cat is in an agreeable mood.

That’s it. That’s the revolutionary new method that “science” made for us, according to Newsweek. “Science” must be proud of itself!

With this wonderful new method I should be able to trim one of Bud’s paws by 2067.

Obviously this is not science. It’s a method, not research. It’s well-intentioned and designed to keep cats comfortable, and those are noble goals, but calling it “science” is misleading, just like every other dumb headline that asserts “science says” or something is true “according to science,” as if science is an omniscient entity lounging on pillows, being fed candied figs by worshipful attendants and occasionally dispensing little nuggets of wisdom for our tiny little brains to absorb.

“The designated hitter rule shall henceforth be abolished,” Science says betwixt pulls from a hookah. “Fifty years of conclusive OPS plus FIP and OAVG data dictate it must be so.”

Come to think of it, that probably is what most Americans think science is. The other half think it’s Anthony “I Am Soyence” Fauci.

Where were we? Ah yes, cat claws!

The truth is I’ve give up on trimming Bud’s claws. If I notice a really long one I’ll try to trim it, but otherwise I leave the job to him and his 4-foot scratching post.

Maybe that makes me a bad caretaker, but I challenge anyone who’d stick me with that label to try trimming Buddy’s claws.

The little dude goes from chill and relaxed to demonic in a millisecond. He yowls, he thrashes, he flails with claws out and tries to bite any flesh he can reach, no matter how careful I am to try at the “right” time, how gentle I handle him, how careful I am to avoid the quick.

Bribe him with treats? Hah! He will stop yowling and thrashing about with murderous intent just long enough to gobble down the yums, then return to being a whirlwind of claws and teeth without skipping a beat.

And you should hear him. It sounds like I’m torturing Elmo, for crying out loud.

Thankfully he doesn’t hold a grudge and if I give up on trimming, he’ll be ready to plop down into my lap within minutes.

It’s generally understood that all that ghastly claw trimming nonsense is behind us, and we shall speak no more of it.

Speaking of ghastly business, the below video started auto-playing while I was on the throne and filling the idle time by searching for cat-related news:

Bud, who had accompanied me to the human litter box chamber, looked alarmed and disturbed.

I laughed.

“See? You could have gotten stuck with someone who baby talked you, and then you wouldn’t need claw trimming as an excuse to kill humans.”

Now I know exactly what to do to herd him into the bedroom next time I need to vacuum.

“It’s okay, birdie! I’m gonna take care of you, birdie! Okay?!”

Ah, welcome to Casa de Buddy, home of two assholes!

Looks Like Bud’s Got Feline Acne

Little dude has large black spots, possibly scabs, beneath his chin.

I first noticed a black spot under Bud’s chin two or three months ago.

I thought he’d somehow hurt himself, perhaps from sticking his little face everywhere, and the mark looked like a scab to me.

Then it went away, was replaced shortly after by another mark, then a second next to it and now there’s a large black mark under his chin.

The problem is, he won’t cooperate with attempts to photograph it and he acts like I’m torturing him if I gently pick him up and try to get a close-up shot. I was finally able to photograph it by setting my phone to take a photo with a voice command and placing it beneath him, and this is what I saw:

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And a close up with flash:

20231118_190342

It looks a lot like the feline acne photographs I saw when I googled the condition, but this mark is quite big and looks painful.

I wash Bud’s food bowls after every meal and I wash his water bowl out with soap and water a few times a week. Both are stainless steel and his dry food bowl is some sort of ceramic. Nothing plastic that would harbor bacteria.

It may be genetic, he may be not as good about grooming under his chin, or it may be my fault. Bud has always had a lot of discharge from his eyes (the nasty black eye crust) so he does secrete fluids more than most cats.

Regardless, I hope he’s not in serious pain. Has anyone dealt with this before? Do the antimicrobial gels designed for cats actually work?

Some material online suggests using common antibacterial wipes or solutions found in pharmacies, but I’m wary of anything like that because Bud may get it in his mouth while grooming.

Yes, It’s Safe For Your Feline Friend To Eat Catnip

It turns out catnip has a different effect when cats eat it instead of sniffing and rolling around in it.

Is it safe for a cat to eat catnip, and does eating it instead of sniffing it make any difference to the kitty?

I wondered about that while watching Buddy enthusiastically lap up some silver vine and ‘nip yesterday afternoon before he drifted off to nirvana.

If you’re worried about whether it’s safe, don’t be. While most cats tend to sniff or roll around in the stuff, there’s nothing in catnip that can harm them according to veterinarians.

The worst that can happen is a mild stomach ache from eating too much of the good stuff.

As for whether ingesting vs sniffing makes any difference, it turns out it does.

When catnip hits the olfactory receptors, it works as a stimulant, prompting energetic, playful behavior.

But when it’s ingested, catnip has the opposite effect, working as a sedative. Felines who eat the ‘nip become more relaxed, often drooling or drifting off for a nap.

Buddy on catnip
“I think…I’m pretty sure I’m feeling it. Oh yeah! Break out the laser pointer and the snacks!”

That makes perfect sense given my own observations. As a feline who eats catnip, Bud will still play, but he’s lazy about it. Instead of ambushing and tackling his wand toys he’ll just pad up to them, drop to the floor and lazily paw at the plush toys at the end of the string, occasionally biting or rabbit-kicking them.

When all else fails, the laser gets him moving.

Regardless of whether your cat sniffs or eats the good stuff, the effects are relatively short-lived and wear off after about 15 minutes.

Catnip is safe for your furry friends and it’s a great way to help make an indoor cat’s life more exciting.

‘Who Ya Callin’ Chubby?!’ Buddy Goes On A Diet (Again)

Buddy losing his normally meowscular and ripped physique is my fault.

Ruh roh! It’s diet time again.

The meowing protests have begun.

Buddy has noticed his dry food tastes a little bit different, and he’s not happy. And while he may not be good with numbers, he strongly suspects his snack allocations are a little light.

He’s right.

Good boy has become fat boy, and that’s my fault and my responsibility.

When you love your cat, it’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking that giving in all the time is an expression of love.

Cats are pros at insistence, especially when it comes to food. When Buddy stands in front of the treat cabinet and meows mournfully, or when he gives me his sad-eyed stare as if he’s Julius Caesar — “Et tu, Big Bud?” — I’m weak and I fold. Snacks are dispensed.

Fatcat
Chonky cats suffer health problems, reduced mobility and ill-fitting suits. Image: PITB

Yet there’s no denying Bud is plump.

He’s got a belly, and it’s not just his pronounced primordial pouch. His cheeks are starting to fill out. When he loafs, he looks like a gray blob.

He’s also incapable of doing his old door-opening trick, which requires him to jump and momentarily hang from the handle while his feet find purchase on the frame. Shoving off on his hind legs, he would push the handle down while leaning into the door, easing it open.

He’s just too chunky, unable to balance his weight properly to pull it off nowadays.

Most importantly, a chubby Buddy is not a healthy Buddy. That’s my fault.

So it’s back to the diet, and hopefully the little guy can be motivated to move more during play time. If not, well, we’ll have to resort to drastic measures to get him moving. An angry vacuum ought to do it.