If aliens are watching the Earth right now, debating whether to make contact with us, undoubtedly they’d conclude that felines are the true power on this planet.
While humanity is responsible for our vast cities, gleaming technological marvels in orbit — like the James Webb Space Telescope — and awe-inspiring architectural works, cats lounge the halls of power, from the White House (sometimes), to the UK’s No. 10 Downing St., the corporate centers of Japan, and everywhere in cities like Istanbul.
They claim the best spots, operate on their own schedules without regard for anyone else, and are the beneficiaries of entire industries dedicated to their well-being, entertainment and cuisine.
Even the internet, the closest thing to humanity’s collective consciousness, is little more than a conduit for the propagation of images, videos, stories and songs about cats. As of 2025, a whopping 72 percent of all internet traffic is cat-related! I just made that statistic up, but it sounds right, doesn’t it?
While humans slave away, their feline masters laze comfortably. Intelligent aliens will notice it is we who serve meals to cats, not the other way around. We clean their waste, rub their fur on demand, and we’re always stroking their egos by telling them how special, sweet and beautiful they are. Because they are.
The rise of cats coincides with the ascent of felinedom’s foremost sage and scholar, Buddy the Cat. Below you’ll find a collection of some of his most insightful observations.
“The sweetest mice hide in the sharpest bushes.” – Buddy the Cat, Reflections at Mealtime, Vol. III
“It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to ignore.” – Buddy the Cat, On Feline Superiority
“The people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who miss out on naps.” – Buddy the Cat, The Virtues of Inactivity
“I believe we are here on this planet Earth to lounge, nap, and enjoy delicious food.” – Buddy the Cat, Reflections at Mealtime, Vol. XIII
“Observe the human, and its wretched species, always in thrall to an invented concept called time. The time is what you say it is. I say it’s time for a snack.” – Buddy the Cat, Human Failings
“Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by the well-rested.” – Buddy the Cat, The Virtues of Inactivity
“What is an alarm clock, but a device that interrupts dreams?” – Buddy the Cat, On Ridiculous Human Inventions
“A bird doesn’t sing because it has a song, but because you haven’t eaten it yet.” – Buddy the Cat, Reflections At Mealtime, Vol. IV
“Wisdom is knowing there isn’t a day that cannot be improved with a restful nap, preferably several.” – Buddy the Cat, Guiding Principles of Feline Greatness
“Never exert yourself when you can manipulate a human into doing a thing for you.” – Buddy the Cat, Humans: Our Loyal Servants
“One can say many positive things about the human race. Perhaps the most flattering is that we felines consider humans fit to serve us.” – Buddy the Cat, On Feline Superiority
“If an alien says ‘Take me to your leader’ and the humans bring the creature to you, make it wait while you nap. That will immediately establish the power dynamic without the expenditure of energy.” – Buddy the Cat, The Virtues of Inactivity
“Those who claim cats are small and weak should be introduced to tigers. They won’t live to spread their heresy.” – Buddy the Cat, Wisdom From A Magnificent Mind
Pain In The Bud 
Did Buddy ever have a look that said: THY HUMANS ARE IMBECILES? 🤣🤣And if i ever saw an alien i would BEG him or her to take me!!
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Every day. There are times when he looks at me like “I am neither impressed nor amused by you, human.”
And then there are times when he’s so up in my space, I have to nudge him back a bit just so I can breathe.
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When he’s crowding you it means Buddy loves you! One of my cats likes to sleep on my pillow, her back against my head. During the night she shifts until she has most of the pillow and my head’s on a 45 degree angle.
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It’s amazing how they claim more space as the night goes on, and how they’re able to take up so much room despite how small they are.
Yeah, Bud gets a bit too enthusiastic with the crowding lol.
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Buddy is possibly the wisest living creature in the entire universe. Seriously scary!
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Thankfully he’s too lazy to cause any real harm. That wasn’t always the case, otherwise I’d still have my beloved Les Paul.
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“A bird doesn’t sing because it has a song, but because you haven’t eaten it yet.” – Buddy the Cat, Reflections At Mealtime, Vol. IV
LOL!!!
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So wise. He should constantly wear a toga.
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Buddy has also easily managed to have a personal biographer to publish his musings and life details !
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Like Kim Jong Il, he has a retinue of scribes who are on hand at all times, following him with pens at the ready to record his wisdom for posterity.
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I think it’s a shame that I am missing out on the many volumes of Buddy’s musings in my personal bookshelf. I would greatly appreciate it if you would offer up his catalog because I want to have all these thoughts with me forever ❤️ Best to you both and I hope you’re both home in a nice cool place with treats and goodies for the two of you ❤️
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So what you’re saying is you’d totally buy a beautiful leather-bound copy of, say, Reflections at Mealtime? Or The Virtues of Inactivity? 🙂
Maybe I should have The Collected Wisdom of Buddy the Cat made into a handsome leather volume, translated from the original Meowinese, and market it as a way for people to better understand their feline overlords.
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I know Buddy keeps you busy, but if there ever comes a day when you have time, I would absolutely buy the vegan leather bound volumes of all and any of his delightful Meowinese teachings, thoughts and humor. I think it’d be an honor to have them. A piece of you and him nearby. Just food for thought, albeit I know you’re very busy being at the mercy of your little Buddy and the demands of your two legged life. I just wanted you to know there was a person who would love to have all of it and would treasure it (As well as the a artwork from the PITB column…which is fabulous) Take my Buddy’s
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To be honest I haven’t written more (or taken dictation from His Grace, as it were) but I’m working on a few things that might involve hard copies and not just the blog.
You’re right, vegan leather. More than 10 years for me now as a vegetarian, although I gotta get my ass back on protein supplements.
Please give Oreo a head scratch for me.
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I’m excited to see what you’ve got coming up, whenever you’re ready, Buddy related or not (Do Not let him see this)! I would be very interested in reading or viewing whatever is available. I wish you all the very best always and I hope outside of PITB, you do something great for you, just like you’ve done for Buddy! Have a great week & i’ll let Oreo know that last rub was from you.
I changed my avatar on here to him. It’s the most hilarious photo of him and people like it so it’s there. I think it’s the only photo where I swear he called me the b word for being over zealous while photographing him. He had enough before I did 😀
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*Take Care not Take! Ugh, you can’t edit on here & I’m so messy 😭
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Buddy is a very wise kitty. Particularly when it comes to alarm clocks and naps
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You never can have too many naps or too few alarm clocks.
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