Buddy: PITB Is A ‘Terrible’ Site That ‘No One Reads’

Apparently angry that Pain In The Bud hasn’t been featuring enough stories about him, Buddy the Cat went on a tweet storm Tuesday night in which he took aim at the site and its staff.

“Just looked at the failing PITB and saw they published ANOTHER story that’s not about me,” Buddy wrote at 10:57 pm. “That’s obviously why they’re losing readers! Sad!”

Four minutes later he launched another salvo, noting only a handful of stories in the past month were focused on him.

“PITB and its editorial staff think they’re being so inclusive by writing about birds and orange tabbies and Arnold Schwarzenegger,” he wrote. “BORING!”

The former president of the Americats tweeted seven more times in the next 23 minutes before turning his attention back to the site that was named for him and ostensibly exists to feature stories about him.

“That rag, the failing PITB, is no better than the New York Slimes. It claims I slept as a mouse invaded my home. FAKE NEWS!!!” he wrote. “Folks, I am a TREMENDOUS HUNTER and would have DESTROYED that mouse — if it existed. NEWSFLASH: It doesn’t! Another lie by the lamestream media!”

That message was immediately followed by a tweet in which Buddy declared himself “the best hunter of all time, a tremendously talented hunter, and everybody knows it.”

Buddy the Cat
Buddy has expressed his displeasure with PITB.

Buddy’s supporters took his accusations to heart. At a rally in New Jersey attended by 24,000 cats, a tuxedo cat held up a sign that read: “The media hates turkey and hates America!’

Another sign held by an Abyssinian blasted “Low Energy Big Buddy” and referenced C-Anon, a conspiracy theory that imagines Buddy as the leader of a league of patriotic heroes fighting to take down a shadowy kitten smuggling ring.

Supporters of C-Anon believe Buddy is working with “supposedly deceased” cats like Streetcat Bob and Lil Bub to combat insidious canine forces who have allegedly infiltrated feline leadership.

Not all cats are enamored with Buddy, however.

One user, LosGatos446, pointed out that Buddy accusing someone else of being low energy was hypocritical because the silver tabby sleeps between 10 and 16 hours a day, promoting Buddy to reply with a terse “FAKE NEWS!”

Another user with the handle ScaredyCat_Bud shared a video that appeared to show a terrified Buddy dashing for cover behind his human’s legs in response to the crinkle of a paper bag.

“An obvious deepfake!” Buddy replied. “Everyone knows I have tremendous courage. I’m an incredibly, tremendously brave cat!”

10 thoughts on “Buddy: PITB Is A ‘Terrible’ Site That ‘No One Reads’”

  1. Mee-yow deer Buddy wee KNOW you are feercesum am brave an coraeeuss an hansum an clevurr an THE bestest Mousie Hunter EFURR!!!
    Wee stand beeside you all THE way!!
    New York Slim inndeed….BellaSita spit rice all over Pee C when shee red that to mee!!!!
    Mee keepss meowin to ehr to not eat an meow at same time…Hu’manss! Go figure!
    ~~~head rubss~~~BellaDharma~~~ an ***giggellss BellaSita Mum

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Glad you both got a laugh out of it. Of course Buddy himself is very serious about this and has warned me that he could fire me at any moment if I further disappoint him…so maybe I should make sure the next couple of stories are all about him.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Mee-yow Buddy ISS THAT seereuss?? OKay due sum postss ’bout Buddy….wee not wanna lose you Big Buddy!!!
        Sorry mee spellin was pawfull yesterday…sumone (BellaSita Mum) was disstracted an well you know how THAT iss!!
        Guud luck with sum Buddy Bloggiess! 😉
        **purrss** BellaDharma an **giggellss** BellaSita Mum

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Oreo the Tuxedo Cat Boy has spoken & is proud that Buddy took notice of his protest sign & he stands by it. Agreeing with Buddy that the mouse story was an absolute hoax & as his owner (Me) I was the one who,
    concocted a story where he, Oreo, dropped a mouse & let it go outside where it came from, that was simply fake news!!!! He understands Buddy’s plight & sees this column often as a witch hunt of sorts 😳. I have told him I don’t agree with him & his exploits, in which he tried to have me removed from my position as human Cat mom but realized I’m still useful so he’ll keep me, as I bring treats, good foods & clean litter. However, if I screw up (His words not mine) he’ll warm up to other’s & i’ll find myself replaced! I gasped in astonishment & he in pure tuxedo style, proceeded to lift his leg & lick as his sign of complete & utter disgust of my position…However, he sent many purrs to Buddy & head bumps of allegiance his way. Hail to the King of Turkey treats & The Biggest Killer of Mice our city has ever seen!!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Oreo is a perceptive feline and obviously has a keen nose for fake news. When will these slanderous stories about hiding from mice end? Everybody knows no self-respecting cat would allow a rodential intruder into his or her domicile! Please give Oreo a treat and a head scratch from me.

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Will do & this mice issue has taken in a life of its own!! Best to you & The King of Cats, the fearless leader & great all around handsome cat Buddy.🐾🐾

        Liked by 2 people

  3. The media is obviously full of jealous Demo-catts that would delight in taking down Buddy and his meowvolus turkey empire! I wondered why Tuxie was extra tired the other day. Now it’s confirmed he was raising a sign in New Jersey supporting ex Americat president Buddy!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. My poor cat. When I’m not portraying him as a catnip cartel patrón or a single-minded lunatic always scheming to get more turkey, I’m writing him as an absurdly egotistical feline politician whose administration was so disastrous, he was voted out of office after he tried to move the Earth closer to the sun to kill off the coronavirus.

      And yet I’m merely exaggerating qualities — a huge ego, the belief that he’s the boss of everything, an obsession with turkey — that he already has.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. You go, Little Buddy the Cat! You speak the absolute truth. I hope you disregard all slander, lies and insults. You are the best! Those other kitties are just envious of your amazing gifts.😼❤

    Liked by 2 people

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