Point-Counterpoint: ‘Don’t Stop! Scritch Me More, Yeah!’ vs ‘Don’t You Humans Know When Enough Is Enough?’

buddycolumn“Don’t Stop! Scritch Me More, Yeah!”

No! No, no, no, no, no! Do not stop! Bring those magic fingers back over here, right above my ears and…yeah!

That’s the good stuff!

Oh man. Down a little. Right there. That hits the spot! In fact, I bet it’ll feel even better when I help you out and lean into the scratches. Oh. I was right, that does feel good!

Hey, where are you…HEY! Who told you we’re done here?

Sheesh, you’d think I nip at you if you pet me too long or something.

You didn’t spend an adequate enough time on my chin yet, and you know I like it when you swing back around for a sort of “greatest hits” and go through the whole rotation again. Now I’m going to assume you don’t need additional instruction, so I’ll just close my eyes and purr away. Don’t stop until the precise moment you should. That’s a good human.

cute-kitten-eating-finger


buddycolumn“Don’t You Humans Know When Enough Is Enough?”

All right already, sheesh! The petting was good for like 3.275 seconds, but it got really played out after that, and you just kept going!

Well whose fault is it that I delivered a warning bite? Me, or the person who couldn’t tell when it was clearly time to stop rubbing my head?

What is it with you humans, huh? Learn to read the room. If I want more scritches, I’ll ask for them.

But no. When I was tired of it, you allowed another two tenths of a second to elapse before ceasing all massaging activities. TWO TENTHS OF A SECOND! I should have you flogged for your insolence!

You’ve had years to improve at this, human. That’s thousands of scritches and massages delivered to my chin, my cheeks, the top of my head and behind the ears. What can account for your complete failure to anticipate the exact millisecond the petting should stop?

You disappoint me.

Point-Counterpoint presents two essays taking opposing positions on a topic. Join us again next week, when Buddy the Cat will debate Buddy the Cat on another important topic.

Top image credit: Pexels


5 thoughts on “Point-Counterpoint: ‘Don’t Stop! Scritch Me More, Yeah!’ vs ‘Don’t You Humans Know When Enough Is Enough?’”

  1. Little Buddy, you are the most expressive cat I’ve ever listened to. Your verbal skills are EXCELLENT. But I assume you are already aware of all this😻

    Liked by 3 people

    1. He’s had plenty of practice, years of talking and talking and talking, making all his demands quite clear to me. Just now he yelled at me (“Yeeoooowww!”) because he wanted his third snack of the day, and it isn’t even 3 p.m.!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Buddy is, of course, correct, timing is critical in petting and scratches, resulting in a purr (yes) or a claw (no) as Buddy says, this is simple and easy to understand, but Humans still fail to understand this…

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Oh my the great scritch debate is eternal. I don’t know if we’ll ever get it right but all the same, I’ll take all I can get (Warning bites & all) because I’m just glad Oreo is here with me to receive them. Life’s too short to do without the great scritch/ scratch debate 👣🐾🐾🤔💕

    Like

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