I’m curious what your response is now that we know cats can get Coronavirus. You thought you were so smart with your “investigation” linking it to Corona beer and insisting only humans could get it.
What do you have to say for yourself now?
– Told Ya in Toledo
Dear Told Ya,
Nonsense! We are immune. We don’t drink Corona because we’re cats, therefore we can’t get Corona Virus. It really shouldn’t be that difficult for you to understand.
– Buddy
Dear Buddy,
You big dummy! The virus isn’t spread through beer, it’s spread through contact with sick humans. You can get it, I can get it, any cat can get it.
– Said So in San Francisco
Dear Said So,
Nonsense! You don’t have any evidentiary materials proving such alarmist allegations!
I am immune to Coronavirus because I am a big, powerful tiger. So even if common cats like you can get it, you’re weaklings and I have big muscles.
– Buddy the Beast
Buddy after his regular workout on Tuesday after making gains on his lats. Credit: Devendra Kumar
Wait…Isn’t that where you live, in New York not far from the Bronx Zoo? Just a few miles from what I recall.
What say you now, “tiger”?
– Said So in San Francisco
Dear Buddy,
Did you get my last message? Still waiting.
– Said So
Dear Buddy,
Unbelievable. After talking all that crap, you disappear? Typical!
– Said So
Dear Said So,
Buddy went into hiding under my bed three days ago and hasn’t emerged since. He said he’s “distance socializing.” I’ve had to slide his meals and water to him under the bed because he won’t come out.
It’s been difficult to get a word out of him, which is highly unusual for a cat who typically won’t shut up, but I have overheard him muttering something like “OMG even the tigers, even the tigers! Don’t think about that. You are handsome and young and you have big muscles. You are handsome and young and you have big muscles. You are healthy and have big muscles…”
I don’t know when I’ll be able to coax him out again, but it probably won’t be soon. If you want to leave a message, I’ll try to pass it along with his next meal.
– Big Buddy, human caretaker (not butler or servant) to Little Buddy the Cat
The last image of Buddy before he went into self-isolation under his human’s bed.
Buddy the Cat and his human watch The Big Lebowski and record a commentary track for your enjoyment and illumination.
Unused Audio Commentary for The Big Lebowski, 20th anniversary Blu-ray special edition with 32 seconds of extra footage, featuring Buddy the Cat and his human, Big Buddy.
Big Buddy the Human: Hello and thanks for joining us on this special commentary track for one of the most beloved cult films of the past quarter century.
Little Buddy the Cat: The Big Lebowski!
Big Buddy: Yep. There’s a Big Lebowski and a Little Lebowski, just like I’m Big Buddy and you’re Little Buddy.
Little Buddy: Let me guess: The Little Lebowski is the more awesome of the two, and he’s the hero of the story?
Big Buddy: That’s correct. Although in this movie he’s referred to as “The Dude” by anyone who knows him, just like you’re “The Jerk” to anyone who knows you. Now we see the opening shots of a supermarket as the Dude shops for a pint of milk. This movie is set in the 1990s. George Bush is on the TV warning Saddam Hussein: “This aggression will not stand!”
Little Buddy: No, it will not!
“This aggression will not stand!”
Big Buddy: I love this part. The Dude doesn’t even get his foot in the door of his home before these thugs grab him. They’re dunking his head in the toilet bowl.
Little Buddy: His litter box! Oh that’s nasty.
Big Buddy: They want money. They keep saying “Where’s the money, Lebowski?” as they dunk his face into the toilet. And now probably the most pivotal moment in the movie…the second thug pees on The Dude’s rug.
Little Buddy: Unbelievable! Who would do something like that? Who would pee on a rug? Certainly not I.
Big Buddy: Says the rug-pee-er.
Little Buddy: I am not!
Big Buddy: Please. Your kind are notorious for pissing all over rugs. It’s like a national pastime with you people.
Little Buddy: ‘You people’? ‘Your kind’? That’s so racialist!
Big Buddy: You’re a cat, you can’t be the victim of racism.
The inciting incident: A thug pees on The Dude’s rug.
Little Buddy: We’re not here to talk about me peeing on rugs. We’re here to talk about thugs peeing on The Dude’s rug. Why does The Dude owe them money?
Big Buddy: He doesn’t. That’s the whole point. These thugs have the wrong Lebowski.
Little Buddy: So they peed on the wrong Lebowski’s rug? That rug really tied the room together! Please tell me The Dude gets a good rug to replace the one that’s been peed on.
Big Buddy: That’s the plot of this movie. One man’s relentless search for a perfect rug to tie the room together and replace the rug that’s been peed on.
Little Buddy: I like it already! What’s this?
Big Buddy: This is a bowling alley, where people play a game called bowling…
The Dude, Donny and Walter at the bowling alley. As per usual, Donny is out of his element.
Little Buddy: Are they…?
Big Buddy: Yes.
Little Buddy: Hold on, hold on! You’re telling me humans play a game in which the object is to swipe things off a flat surface?!
Big Buddy: That’s correct.
Little Buddy: And you never thought to tell me this? You know how much I love swiping things off flat surfaces!
Big Buddy: I never really thought of it that way, but I suppose you would like…
Little Buddy: This is vital information! When can we go?!?
Big Buddy: Well how about we watch the movie first? I promise there’s a ton of bowling in it for you to get your vicarious thrills. Then we can talk about going bowling.
Little Buddy: Deal. This is gonna be so much fun!
Big Buddy: Okay. So we get this establishing shot of synchronized bowlers, and now we meet the rest of our heroes — The Dude’s friends, Walter and Donnie.
Little Buddy: Walter is upset about something. He doesn’t roll on Shabbos.
Big Buddy: No, he does not.
Shomer Shabbos!
Big Buddy: So as The Dude tells them the story about the desecrated rug, it’s Walter’s idea to confront the Big Lebowski to get compensation. After all, those thugs were looking for him, not The Dude. The Dude takes Walter’s advice and goes to speak to The Big Lebowski.
Little Buddy: Who’s this guy?
Big Buddy: That’s Brandt, the Big Lebowski’s Butler.
Little Buddy: Ah. His servant, like you are for me.
Big Buddy: Not exactly. Brandt shows The Dude around, tells him about the Little Lebowski Urban Achievers, and introduces him to The Big Lebowski himself.
Little Buddy: This guy is the Big Lebowski?
Big Buddy: Yep.
Little Buddy: I was expecting a much bigger Lebowski.
Big Buddy: Well I suppose “The Slightly Larger Lebowski” doesn’t have the same ring to it.
The Slightly Larger Lebowski.
Little Buddy: The Big Lebowski doesn’t seem very receptive to The Dude’s argument.
Big Buddy: That’s putting it mildly. He thinks The Dude is a joint-smoking deadbeat.
Little Buddy: That’s because The Dude is a joint-smoking deadbeat. It looks like a wonderful life. Catnip, naps and food.
Big Buddy: How is that different from your daily existence?
Little Buddy: It’s not, which is why I love The Dude. Speaking of, where’s the nip?
Big Buddy: You want it now? Seriously?
Little Buddy: Gimme, gimme! I feel like I should be on The Dude’s wavelength when I watch this movie. Thanks, amigo!
Buddy gets into the spirit — and The Dude’s mind state — with a nip break.
Big Buddy: Okay. So I like how The Dude isn’t dissuaded. The Big Lebowski is screaming at him, refusing to compensate him for his rug, and does that stop him? No! He just leaves and tells Brandt: “The old man told me to take any rug in the house.”
Little Buddy: Who’s this lady painting her toes?
Big Buddy: That’s Bunny Lebowski, the Big Lebowski’s trophy wife.
Bunny Lebowski, a woman who charges outrageous fees to blow on people’s toes.
Little Buddy: She’s asking The Dude to blow on her toes, and he does, but she says he has to pay $1,000 if he wants her to blow his toes. That hardly seems fair.
Big Buddy: She’s not offering to blow on his toes, she’s…ah, nevermind. You wouldn’t understand.
Little Buddy: Why?
Big Buddy: Because you’re a cat.
Little Buddy: Racialist!
Big Buddy: A neutered cat.
Little Buddy: What’s noodured?
Big Buddy: Nevermind. The Dude tells Bunny he’s going to find an ATM, but now we’re back at the bowling alley with Walter and Donny.
“I’ll go find an ATM…”
Little Buddy: Is that a dog in a carrier?
Big Buddy: Yes.
Little Buddy: That’s absurd! Who brings a dumb animal bowling? Especially a dumb animal who most certainly does not appreciate the finer things in life, like swiping objects off flat surfaces.
(ON SCREEN) WALTER: “What do you mean “brought it bowling”? I didn’t rent it shoes. I’m not buying it a fucking beer. He’s not gonna take your fucking turn, Dude.”
Little Buddy: See? The Dude and I think alike. Whoah! A gun! Walter has a gun! What’s he doing?
Big Buddy: He’s threatening Smokey, another bowler. He says Smokey was over the line when he bowled.
Little Buddy: Oh. Then why not just shoot him? Mark it zero!
Walter, the only sane voice in the movie, prevents social order from breaking down by threatening to shoot a man over a bowling disagreement.
Big Buddy: Smokey marks it zero.
Little Buddy: Hell yeah.
Big Buddy: Walter and The Dude gotta bounce quick, one of the managers is calling the cops.
Little Buddy: *yawn* What for?
Big Buddy: For pulling a gun during a game of bowling, little guy! You can’t just do that to people. Oh, I love this part when they walk to the car and argue…
Big Buddy: Bud?
Big Buddy: Buddy, wake up!
Big Buddy: I knew it. Okay, that’s all for today, folks, Buddy is in a catnip coma and I don’t think he’s waking up any time soon. Join us next time for Part II of Unused Audio Commentary: The Big Lebowski! Thanks for rolling with us on Shabbos.
A 78-foot-tall mecha guards Tokyo’s entertainment district.
Chances are you’ve seen a Gundam even if the name seems unfamiliar.
Gundam are sleek androform robots piloted by humans and often seen wielding massive guns, utility-pole-size katanas and other outrageous weaponry.
The name Gundam is synonymous with “Japanese robot,” and the IP is one of the top 15 highest-grossing media properties in the world, putting it in the same company as franchises like Star Wars, the Marvel Cinematic Universe, the Batman/DC Comics universe and Lord of the Rings.
In other words, Gundam is serious business in Asia.
A typical Gundam figurine assembled from a model kit.
The cult franchise began with a 1979 cartoon series and expanded to include movies, manga and spinoffs, but the real moneymakers are plastic model kits of the many mecha in the wider Gundam universe. Gundam mecha account for 90 percent of all model kit sales in Japan, and they’re wildly popular worldwide, including the United States.
With all of that in mind, maybe it’ll seem a little less crazy that Tokyo has a life-size Gundam standing guard over Odaiba in a major commercial plaza. The 24-meter (78-foot) statue is impressive in its own right, but at night it reaches new levels of awesomeness when the robot’s lights activate, bathing the behemoth in ambient crimson.
A life-size Unicorn Gundam statue keeps watch over the Odaiba district of Tokyo.Facing out from the complex, Unicorn Gundam seems to guard Diver City.
After spending a few hours wandering Tokyo’s incredible Digital Art Lab, it was past sundown and pouring when we reached the statue. I got soaked for my efforts, but it was worth it to see the iconic mecha with my own eyes.
To provide a sense of scale, the average adult male is about as tall as the Gundam’s ankle.
Every half hour after sundown passersby can watch the Gundam transform between “Unicorn Mode” and “Destroy Mode.” Panels and sections on the robot’s torso fold into a new, more aggressive-looking pose, while alternate lights are activated and more protective armor encases the machine’s head.
A close-up shows the illumination of the Unicorn Gundam statue at night.The statue is remarkably detailed and captures the sleek — and iconic — look of the franchise’s mecha.
Tokyo may belong to its cats, but in Shibuya a dog holds a special place in everyone’s hearts.
Every day on his way home from work, Hidesaburō Ueno would step off the train at Shibuya Station and find his Akita dog, Hachiko, waiting for him.
Hachiko adored Ueno, an agriculture engineering professor at Tokyo Imperial University, now called the University of Tokyo.
Then one day Ueno was in mid-lecture in front of a class of students when he suffered a brain hemorrhage and died on the spot.
For the first time, Hachiko went to Shibuya Station and didn’t see his beloved human step off the train to greet him.
The little dog went back the next day. And the next. And the day after that.
Hachiko went to the Shibuya Station every day for the next 10 years, until he died of old age.
Today the world’s most loyal dog is remembered with a statue at Shibuya Crossing, the world’s busiest intersection.
It’s a place marked by impermanence — three thousand pedestrians traverse Shibuya’s scramble crossing during every traffic light cycle, and thousands of faces come and go on the array of massive video screens overlooking the intersection.
The one thing that never changes is Hachiko, standing in the same spot he returned to every day, eternally keeping watch for his buddy.
———————
In 2015, the University of Tokyo unveiled a new statue on its campus, reuniting Hachiko with Ueno in the afterlife:
Photo credit: Joyce Lam/TimeOut Tokyo
Finally, who’s that dapper fellow pouring sake? That’s my man Satoshi, bartender at what he translated as a “little drink box” —- one of Shibuya’s tiny bars, dozens of which are packed into alleys between the main streets.
Satoshi’s bar seats five people, so we drank with two Tokyo natives who kindly humored me and my questions while my brother did his best at translating. He’s pretty good! I’m proud of him for learning the language so well, even though he insists he’s not very good.
Today I return to Shibuya to help my sister-in-law find a birthday present for my brother, and my next stop is Odaiba to meet a life-size Gundam RX-0 Unicorn.
Photo credit: Tom Roseveare
Note: All photos by Big Buddy unless noted. The photos of Shibuya Crossing were taken from an observation platform on the rooftop of a nearby building.
I’m here! Not much to show yet, as I didn’t quite nail the settings for properly shooting such a light-ambient city on my first night walk around Tokyo.
The immediate neighborhood is midway between Roppongi and Akasaka, not far from Tokyo Midtown. The word Roppongi means “six trees,” and the name dates back almost four centuries when the area was marked by half a dozen distinctive zelkova, also known as Japanese elm.
Here’s an aerial photo of the district:
As you can see, there’s a nice balance between green areas and urban density. Whereas New York has a very straightforward grid layout and you can get a feel for the dimensions of the city by looking down certain avenues running the length or width of the island, it’s easy to see why some people say Tokyo feels never-ending, one big sprawl of twisting streets, hills and alleys.
There’s also a verticality that gives it a different feel from American cities. Manhattan is famous for its urban “canyons,” but oftentimes there’s a clear demarcation between residential and commercial, both horizontally and vertically. Stores and restaurants are almost always on street level, while upper levels are either apartments or offices.
In this part of Tokyo the restaurants, shops, karaoke bars and movie theaters are just as likely to be on the 10th floor as the first, and the signs are often inscrutable even when they’re in English: A sign for one place, called Seven, includes no information about what kind of establishment it is beyond a cryptic piece of text that reads “I like when fight pure.”
Maybe it’s a boxing gym where they’re really sensitive about the rules. Or maybe it’s a bar where Japanese women mud-wrestle. Either one seems just as likely.
Below are some day shots, including a koi pond in the courtyard of my brother’s building. I’m not sure if Buddy would lick his lips or run in terror from these koi. They’re pretty big. And orange. And they jump! Any one of those things are enough to strike fear in the heart of the scaredy cat. Strange to think they can live as long as 35 years.
Meanwhile back in New York…
Looking at this photo, it almost seems like Buddy’s laying there dejected, thinking “Woe is me! Where has my Big Buddy gone? I am lost without him!”
Yet my mom reports Buddy waited for me and barely ate the first night, then by the second night he realized he’s still getting treated like a king, so he’s over it. The little jerk!
Pain In The Bud 