Human Spies Have Infiltrated Catdom To Learn Our Secrets!

A Very Important Message from Buddy to all cats:

My brothers and sisters,

I meow most urgently to inform you that human mischief knows no bounds, and now the two-legged scoundrels have resorted to using their magical glowing rectangles to spy on us and learn our most well-kept secrets!

It would appear the glowing rectangles are more than mere hypnosis machines which humans stare at for hours. Apparently they also do the bidding of their human masters, and one of these blasted machines surreptitiously used its magic to capture images of a kitty opening one of those infernal portals humans are so fond of:

This is not good! Humans are supposed to think we’re incapable of manipulating the simple mechanisms that keep these “doors” closed. Now they may take drastic measures to confine us, all because this cat was sloppy and opened a door without checking if the coast was clear.

I urge you to exercise the utmost caution before humans capture “footage” of one of us shapeshifting to get through a small space, or even using our powers of teleportation!

It is imperative that humans continue to believe we’re just fluffy, adorable and innocent little fur babies who do amusingly derpy things that make for cute viral videos.

Suppose humans learn the full range of our powers. What then? Will they evict us from our homes out of fear of what we might do to them? Or worse, will they force us to stoop to canine levels and do things for them, like “fetch” slippers or sniff for illegal catnip in airport luggage? The horror!

Watch your tails, fellow felines!

Your friend,


10 thoughts on “Human Spies Have Infiltrated Catdom To Learn Our Secrets!”

  1. Years ago at a place I worked we had an office cat. It was a small office, on the second floor of an equally small 2-story building. The office door knob was the lever style. Snuggles (named by committee) was always letting himself out. He rarely got very far because the door squeaked.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Tux calls upon Buddy, leader of the americats to stop this human snooping! He is already suspicious of the glowing rectangle which has been spying on him lately!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Rumor has it that these sneaky humans have potentially hundreds of photos of their cats on their mysterious handheld glowing rectangles. What have cats done to deserve this kind of surveillance? Buddy and Tux must follow the evidence.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I have read in more than one place that “scientists” had determined that cats are not smart enough to understand that a doorknob is what opens the door, which I knew from observing my own cats, one of which would reach up and pat the doorknob when he wanted to go out, that it was the scientists who were the doorknobs.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. I think some scientists are so wary of anthropomorphism and so myopic when it comes to their focus on repeatable experiments that they ignore or discount simple empirical evidence, like this video of a cat opening a door.

      Not everything can be tested in a lab environment, and that’s okay. It’s like the Orangutan named Fu Manchu who lived at the Omaha Zoo in the 60s. He kept escaping his enclosure, and the staff thought someone was leaving doors open, not even considering that he had figured out a way to free himself. And that’s exactly what he was doing, using a small piece of wire to pick the locks, get through several sets of doors, and take trips outside his enclosure to hang out in different trees and see the rest of the zoo.

      There’s gotta be a healthy balance between avoiding anthropomorphism and discounting the blatantly obvious.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. You mean your kitty uses his/her claws to get a grip on the screen and moves it that way? If so I’m very fortunate my little guy hasn’t figured out that trick.


  4. Why can’t people leave animals alone and let the cats live their own life. People have turned the cats into super models dressing them up and making models out of them. I have never. seen a cat or dog enjoying it. Why the cat. cannot wait to pull all those heating pieces off from that beautiful fur.

    Liked by 1 person

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