Dear Buddy,

My, you’re a handsome one. And single, too. Why don’t you and I get together?

– Cali the Calico

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Dear Cali,

Thanks! Get together to do what, exactly?

– Buddy

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Dear Buddy,

No need to be so coy, we’re both adults. To make more kitties, of course!

– Cali

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Dear Cali,

I’m confused. Big Buddy says the Kitty Stork delivers the kittens. Won’t the stork be mad that we’re taking his job?

Buddy

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Dear Buddy,

Oh you little joker! Now seriously, I’m in heat so where will we meet?

Cali

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Cali,

The heat wave is really bad! You should drink lots of water and make sure you get enough protein.

– Buddy

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Buddy,

Okay, do you seriously not understand how kittens are made? Didn’t anyone ever have ‘the talk’ with you about the birds and the bees?

Cali

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Cali,

Now you’re confusing me. I know about the stork. No one ever said bees were involved. I don’t like bees.

Buddy

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Jerk Face,

Wow, what a man-child! I’ll bet you play video games too with your precious “Big Buddy.” Losers!

– Cali

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Cali,

We love playing video games! But we win more than we lose! If you wanted to come over to play video games, why didn’t you just say so?

Hello?

Hello?!

Cali??

Was it something I said?