We’re not big on celebrity stuff here on Pain In The Bud, but we’ll make an exception for Jennifer Garner, her cat Moose and The Case of the Relentless Klingon.
The entirely ghastly ordeal unfolds on video (below) as the Alias star takes, uh, matter into her own hands when Moose’s business gets stuck in his fur.
“Something’s gone awry,” Garner says in the beginning of the clip before whispering into the camera. “Moose pooped his pants … He’s befouled!”
Garner proceeds to lift Moose into the kitchen sink, alternately praising him and saying she feels bad giving him a bath because he’s the nicest cat she’s ever had. At first Moose endures it like a champ, seemingly resigned to getting scrubbed and having the offending piece of poop removed from his long coat.
“There’s something caught,” Garner says as she struggles to free the Klingon from a tangle of fur. “I know, Moose. I’m so sorry!”
But it’s all too much for Moose, who doesn’t want to wait for Garner to wash the soap out of his fur and grows increasingly impatient. After Garner tells him to hang in just a little longer and second guesses herself (“What would my mom do?”), Moose has finally had enough and delivers a paw smack to Garner’s cheek, then lets his claws do the talking.
“I don’t blame him,” she says later as she bleeds from claw wounds to her neck.
It’s clear Garner loves the little guy. The actress, a known cat lover, has been photographed walking with Moose in a stroller, and starred in 2016’s Nine Lives, a movie about a cat who was unfortunately voiced by Kevin Spacey less than a year before he became persona non grata in the wake of the Harvey Weinstein scandal and the #MeToo movement.