Buddy’s Letter To Santa Claws: A Very Roomba Christmas

Dear Santa Claws,

Hi, this is Buddy the Good Boy from New York!

Please help me, Santa! For the past four years I’ve been asking my Big Buddy for a Roomba for Christmas, and every Christmas morning I have been disappointed when there is no Roomba beneath the tree. 😦

What is a Roomba? I’m glad you asked! A Roomba is a round robot made for cats, so we can have fun riding around the house! You just sit on top of it, and it moves all over the place! There are lots of videos on the MewTube showing cats having fun on their Roombas.

I am such a good boy. I finish my food most of the time, I only scratch the couch a little bit, and I haven’t destroyed anything valuable in almost three months! And if Big Buddy told you about the time I puked on his my bed, well that was an accident, okay? I usually puke on the carpet like a civilized cat.

Please, Santa, the only thing I want this year is a Roomba!

Your friend,

Buddy

PS: Look at how much fun it is!

French Couple Buys ‘Savannah Kitten,’ Gets Tiger Cub Instead

A French couple who answered an online ad to buy a Savannah kitten ended up with a tiger cub instead.

The couple, from Le Havre — a coastal town in Normandy, about 110 miles west of Paris — plunked down $7,000 for the little cat, who they were told was an exotic mix between a Serval and a domestic cat.

After about a week, they realized their “kitten” was a tiger cub and contacted authorities, UPI reported. Specialists from the French Biodiversity Office determined the cub is a Sumatran tiger and are caring for the growing cat.

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That happened back in 2018, and the reason we’re only hearing about it now is because French police have completed their investigation in which they tracked down the seller and arrested nine people on animal trafficking laws.

There are only some 4,000 tigers remaining in the wild in the entire world. Habitat destruction, poaching and the illegal wildlife market are the primary causes pushing the iconic big cats to extinction.

Meanwhile, Buddy the Cat believes he too was born of wild tiger stock and was mistaken for a common kitten when he was adopted by Big Buddy.

“Obviously, they dyed my fur gray,” Buddy said. “But they couldn’t do anything to hide how ripped I am.”

All images via Wikimedia Commons.

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The Unflattering Cat Photo Challenge!

The hashtag #unflatteringcatphotochallenge has been trending on Twitter and Instagram the past few days, and Buddy’s not one to let an opportunity go by.

Here’s a derpy and surprised-looking Buddy:

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Here’s a loafing, chubby-looking Buddy:

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Here’s an out-of-focus, annoyed-looking, panting Buddy:

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Here’s baby Buddy looking like he’s a strangled muppet:

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Study Confirms Cats Are Set At Ease By ‘Slow Blinks’

I’d been in Japan for almost two weeks last year when I dialed back to the States on a Facetime call and my mom — who had been taking care of Buddy in my absence — held Bud up to her iPad.

“Someone wants to say hi to you,” she said.

Buddy looked at me, then tentatively blinked with one eye. When I returned the blink, he meowed excitedly, reaching a paw out to the screen.

Aside from making me feel bad about leaving my cat for so long, the exchange between Bud and I seemed to confirm the importance of the slow eye-blink in feline-human communication. It also confirmed that he missed me.

Now there’s a formal study that, for the first time, shows cats are more relaxed and more likely to approach humans — even strangers — if they’re greeted with a slow blink. Cats also like to reciprocate with a slow blink of their own when greeted that way, the study found.

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Credit: u/sol-aurum/Reddit

“This study is the first to experimentally investigate the role of slow blinking in cat-human communication,” said Karen McComb, a psychologist from the University of Sussex and co-author of the study. “And it is something you can try yourself with your own cat at home, or with cats you meet in the street. It’s a great way of enhancing the bond you have with cats. Try narrowing your eyes at them as you would in a relaxed smile, followed by closing your eyes for a couple of seconds. You’ll find they respond in the same way themselves and you can start a sort of conversation.”

Why does a slow blink put cats at ease?

Tasmin Humphrey, a Ph.D. student and study co-author, said it’s “possible that slow blinking in cats began as a way to interrupt an unbroken stare, which is potentially threatening in social interaction.”

The researchers say their results could help people communicate more clearly with their cats, and could be useful in shelters, where staff and volunteers are often tasked with trying to calm scared cats.

Modern Box: The Magazine For Discerning Felines

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Buddy the Cat, publisher and editor-in-chief of the all-new Modern Box Magazine, seeks cats of considerable taste for the ultimate feline lifestyle publication. The editorial department seeks cats for the following positions: Investigative Eater, Box Reviewer, Keyboard Warmer, Leisure Editor. Must have at least three years’ experience sleeping, eating and lounging in a human home.